Chapter 4

It was sudden, but travelers were always like this. They never gave you time to build feelings gradually. Perhaps it was because their time spent in one place was limited.

From his straightforward actions, I felt the anxiety caused by my divine power fading away. Now, Felix just looked like any other nondescript traveler. If he had some kind of plan, he wouldn’t have rushed in so recklessly without any prior signs. In any case, it was a relief if he hadn’t noticed. Once suspicion vanished from my heart, I found no reason to hold back and placed my hands on his back.

After all, it was a cold, snowy night. If there was something to soothe the boredom, I was happy to take it.

“Do you want to go to my room?”

After pulling his lips away for a long time, he touched my hair and shoulders, asking cautiously.

“Sure.”

I threw away my polite demeanor and spoke to him informally. I was already feeling annoyed at the prospect of having to pretend to be polite all by myself while receiving no respect in return from someone who looked to be around my age. Even though my attitude changed in an instant, Felix didn’t seem surprised and just smiled quietly.

While we were sitting facing each other on the bed and kissing, Felix lowered the hand that had been stroking my face and untied the strings of my bodice. Following his lead, I placed my hands on the buttons of his shirt. As my fingertips brushed lightly against his skin while undoing the buttons, I could feel every muscle he touched tensing firmly, as if reacting to my touch.

I was feeling pleasant shivers everywhere his hands touched as well. When I pulled my lips away and opened my eyes, I met his gaze, which was staring at me deeply.

Before long, Fel threw his clothes aside and completely stripped me of mine as well. We wrapped our arms around each other’s faces, kissed again, and pressed our bodies tightly together. I liked the sensation of warm heat spreading throughout my entire body.

I moved my body as if rubbing it against his. Felix’s hand, which had been sweeping down along my spine, paused. Soon, he rested his forehead on my shoulder and let out a low sigh.

“Why?”

“I can’t hold back anymore.”

“Hm? Ah…!”

Felix pushed me down onto the sheets and climbed on top. The foreplay that had been so pleasant was cut off abruptly just like that.

I could feel his sex searching for the opening and pushing in urgently. I reflexively furrowed my brows and expressed my pain. However, Felix, who was already holding me without any gap, didn’t see that signal of discomfort. In the end, I was swept away by a force like a gale.

“Ah!”

Unfortunately, there was no opportunity for me to get on top of him on the bed. He pinned me down from start to finish, and because he was putting so much strength into his pressure, it was truly agonizing for the one being crushed underneath.

In the midst of that, his pushing force while joined was also so strong that it felt like my insides were going to burst in more ways than one.

“Ugh, ah…”

Are you a beginner, or what? How can you be so clumsy and rough? I had thought he was pretty good at kissing, too. Every time I expressed that it was too much and tried to push his shoulders away, he would instead cling even tighter and crush me.

“Nngh, it hurts…!”

“Sorry… sorry.”

Don’t just apologize—couldn’t you let me enjoy it a little, too? This really isn’t fun. I’m not some naive girl who goes crazy just because things are chaotic and rough. It’s not that I hate it, but no matter what, having it be “all-out-intensity” from start to finish isn’t my taste. I wanted to match our tempo and explore and enjoy it leisurely, even down to the rhythm of our hips.

Ah—so annoying! Eventually, losing my temper, I bit his ear a bit hard. Only then did Felix pause and look at my face. Following me as I caught my breath, he also composed himself for a moment. But before long, he began to kiss me urgently again and pulled my body in without a gap.

It’s stifling. I’m dizzy. It’s hard. I feel like I’m going to suffocate to death. Perhaps this is what it feels like to be crushed dough.

Later on, I became too tired to demand that he go slowly or ease up, so I just gave up and surrendered my body to him. After floundering for a long time—flipping over if he flipped me, folding up if he folded me—Felix finally seemed to sense something was off, hesitated, and pulled his body away.

“…Iel?”

“…”

“Are you okay?”

I am not okay. And it’s too late to pretend to care now. Already sulking, I glared at him, leaving a silent curse. Flustered, Felix lifted me up and leaned me against the headboard of the bed. Looking a bit tense, he asked cautiously.

“Do you want some water?”

“…”

I didn’t answer, but Felix went to the table on his own and brought back a glass of water. I stared at the cup held delicately in his two hands for a moment before taking a sip. Perhaps because my trembling arms looked unstable, Felix soon overlapped his hands and held it with me.

“Ah…”

I didn’t even have the strength to swallow, so a little spilled out of my mouth. Felix lightly wiped my chin and lips with his hand. His fingertips were rough, but his somewhat thoughtful behavior melted my heart a little. It was a big factor that I felt a warmth I couldn’t quite name in his gaze as he scrutinized me, as if genuinely worried. I really am a person who’s easy to win over.

Still, since I hadn’t completely thawed out, the voice that barely managed to escape sounded a bit sulky even to my own ears.

“My whole body is sore.”

At those words, Felix immediately began to massage my arms and shoulders. The feeling of his warm hands kneading away wasn’t bad. As I let out a languid sigh, his hands slowed down a bit. The massage gradually turned into subtle strokes, and by the time I was nodding off and woke up with a start, his head was buried in my skin.

“Ah…!”

I gripped his hair. The sensation of him sucking pleasurably was thrilling. After bringing me to a climax once more just like that, Felix bit the inside of my thigh lightly and looked up. His eyes, appearing as obedient as a dog’s, were absolutely wicked.

I didn’t want to do anything more with Felix now.

My anger had vanished.

They say that sex is similar to riding a horse. I agree to some extent, in that it requires both communion and technique.

Although Felix showed a slightly better side toward the end, overall, I was honestly disappointed. It didn’t feel like riding a horse; it felt like I was being dragged along the ground while clinging to the horse. It means it was only difficult and not very fun.

Nevertheless, I later accepted a brief romantic relationship with him. When I actually heard him ask to go out, I did feel annoyed enough to pinch both of his cheeks, but I just let it slide. There were few men who had officially asked me to go out when I had only ever had one-off or, at longest, a few-day partner relationships.

“Iel.”

“Yeah?”

I was making food in front of the hearth when Felix, who had approached close behind my back at some point, whispered in my ear. As I turned my head, he immediately pressed his lips against mine. He pressed with enough force to push my upper body back, then made a popping sound as he pulled away and laughed mischievously. Stirring the pot with a ladle, I scolded him.

“I told you not to come into the kitchen.”

“It’s fine. I came here on an errand.”

Felix gestured with his eyes toward a box near the entrance. Glancing at it, I saw it was filled with ingredients. He probably took them halfway out of Yumir’s hands, using the excuse of helping out for exercise. There was no way she would volunteer to let a guest do work.

My relationship with Felix had been discovered by Yumir a while ago. As it happened, the first time I slept with him, I ran straight into her while coming out of the room the next day. It was early, long before starting work, and Yumir had given me a look that said she knew exactly what was going on.

It’s an era where many travelers make a living from adventure or hunting monsters, taking advantage of the rifts between worlds. And in an industry that deals with such people, one-off relationships between staff and guests are an everyday occurrence, so Yumir would have been used to it.

Yumir’s own personality wasn’t one to nag about private lives, so she hadn’t said anything at the time, but lately, things were on the edge.

“Sigh… I don’t really like this.”

“…S-sorry.”

The problem was that Felix was too obvious about it. I hadn’t exactly planned on hiding it, but I didn’t intend to be so transparent about it either. I had intended to spend my daily life just like any normal person. But the moment I accepted our relationship, Felix started acting as if he were marking me everywhere, like saying “She’s mine” or “She’s my woman.”

“It’s not that it’s your fault.”

“Haha…”

“It’s just a personal gripe, because there are other guests here, and I’d prefer it if you’d tone it down.”

“Yeah…”

“When a person who already has a presence even when standing still acts like that, the surrounding atmosphere becomes burdened in turn. Especially when it’s this quiet.”

The look of a love-struck fool with honey dripping from his eyes all the time was, if anything, cute. The real problem with Felix was that he didn’t want to be apart from me at all.