Long Time No See And Tofu Hamburgers - Part One

There are meetings in life, and there are partings. That is a natural part of existence.

But there are also reunions. Because partings are not the end.

It’s Shuri. I’ve finally been reunited with everyone. How long has it been? It feels like we haven’t met in months.

As for me, various things have changed, too.

First, a new friend has joined the mercenary band’s kitchen staff.

“So, everyone, long time no see.”

“““Yes, Sensei!”””

When I saw everyone from the kitchen staff after such a long time, they shed tears of joy at our reunion.

Real men’s tears. Everyone is wailing.

It’s… a bit embarrassing. Hehe, I’ll just scratch the tip of my nose to play it off…

“I’m so glad you’ve come back, Sensei!”

“Now we can make hamburgers without anyone complaining!”

“And cream stew, too!”

“Sensei, the women in the Magic Unit are complaining because we’re low on amazake! Please do something!”

“They won’t eat the boiled tofu because they don’t like the sauce!”

“Alright. Okay, that’s enough.”

Yep, I need to have a little talk with the captain-level members. It’s been a long time since I felt anger while keeping a smile on my face.

“Well, you all probably know this already, but a new friend has joined the kitchen staff. This is Mr. Garn Lover. And this is Mr. Adora. Everyone, get along.”

Yes, in the end, Garn and Adora ended up joining the kitchen staff.

We had promised, and I had been acting with the hope that it would turn out this way.

What was unexpected was Adora. I thought he would agonize over it a bit more before reaching a conclusion, but he joined us surprisingly quickly.

To explain, he said he couldn’t reclaim the pride and confidence that Kuuga-san had snapped like a Pocky stick, so he wanted to take me up on my offer.

Of course, I welcome him. It helps solve the chronic shortage of kitchen staff, and above all, I need people who are confident in their strength.

But for some reason, these two are surprised.

“What’s the matter? You can just introduce yourselves, you know?”

“Ah, oh, no. It’s just… I’m surprised at how much you’re looked up to… Is ‘Sensei’ really just a shell?”

“Hahaha, well…”

“Hey, you! That’s rude to Sensei!”

A voice came from among the kitchen staff at Garn’s words.

“That’s right! Sensei is an indispensable person to this mercenary band!”

“If he weren’t here, we wouldn’t be here!”

E-everyone, I never knew you looked up to me that much…!

I’m so happy I could cry. My hard work wasn’t in vain!

“If it weren’t for him, we’d be buried alive by Captain Rir right now!”

“And taking the brunt of Captain Arius’s frustration over her skin breakouts, too!”

“If Sensei isn’t here, no one can stop those two from running wild!”

“Rir-san, Arius-san, that’s a foul.”

I’ll have to give them a good lecture. Just what were they trying to do by threatening the kitchen staff…

“I, I see…”

See! Adora is already completely terrified!

“So Sensei, what shall we make for lunch today?”

Hm?

Ah, is it already lunchtime?

Ever since that incident, our mercenary band has been living in the castle, and we now work in the kitchen.

Along with that, we upgraded from wood-burning stoves to Rir-san’s custom-made Magi-Engineering Stoves. This has really expanded the range of dishes we can make.

Well, everyone is here, so maybe something light like a soup for today…

“If you’re lost, make hamburgers.”

“If it’s for lunch, boiled tofu.”

The person who kicked the door open and came in was Rir-san and Arius-san.

Both of them are smiling. It was a smile beyond any doubt.

Floating a refreshing, likable smile, while concealing—

The jet-black, boiling ambition that seemed to be a compressed mass of all the evil in the world, they approached me with heavy footsteps.

Crap, I’m going to run.

It’s impossible to lecture people like this.

I thought that and tried to back away, but my back hit something.

“G, Garn-san?”

Garn-san was pressing my back from behind, making sure I couldn’t escape.

“Go, you’re the only one we can rely on.”

“Th, that’s unreasonable.”

“If you don’t fight, we’ll all be annihilated.”

Eh? Before I knew it, everyone else had already evacuated to the wall.

You betrayed me!

“B, but…”

“I’m counting on you, Sensei.”

With a thump, I was pushed in the back and shoved in front of Rir-san and Arius-san.

In the corner of my vision, I caught Adora shoving me forward.

You too, Adora—!!

“Now, Shuri. Hamburgers.”

“Boiled tofu, right?”

The moment I tried to escape, my shoulders were grabbed by Rir-san and Arius-san.

Wait…!

It’s no good, I can’t escape!

I felt my life was in danger, but then something strange happened.

Both of them, while still grabbing my shoulders, only turned their heads to look at each other.

Eh? What is this? What kind of horror is this?

“Rir. Shuri is cooking for the first time in a while. Wouldn’t it be better to start with something simple and let him get his senses back?”

“Arius. Since it’s been a while, you should let Shuri start with his specialty dish. That’s why Rir is here.”

You’re drooling, you know. Saying “that’s why I’m here” is just an excuse, right? You just want to eat hamburgers, don’t you?

“Rir, I will eat happily whatever dish comes out. If I had to say, and I really mean if, I would be happy if you served boiled tofu here. No, of course I’m not saying you have to. But my subordinates were also looking forward to boiled tofu. Oh, if it’s something else, then it can’t be helped. But, you know? It’s been a while, so you’d want to eat it, wouldn’t you? No, no, if it’s impossible then that can’t be helped, but…”

So annoying! You’re talking in circles while pointing out exactly what you want!

This is the first time I’ve seen someone try to be so indirect and fail to hide it! It’s almost as if they aren’t even trying to hide it. It makes my heart feel frayed…

Even if I want help, Garn-san is just watching from afar. Hm? His lips are moving…

『If you give it your all, I’ll collect your bones?』

Shut up!

“Please wait. I understand what you want to eat.”

“Then I’ll go get the beef.”

“No, it’s tofu.”

You two, suppress those feelings… Your eyes are scary.

“Let’s use tofu.”

That moment seemed like something I would never forget.

A chill, as if ice water had been poured down my spine!

When I looked timidly in that direction, Rir-san was…

“Haha. Funny joke.”

She said, cracking her knuckles! Along with that, she was stretching her shoulders and arms, and shadow boxing!

Stop it! You aren’t that kind of grappler character!

“However, it is not boiled tofu.”

Whish, whish, a sound began to ring out.

When I looked that way, Arius-san was actually swinging her arms.

She was warming up by loosening all the joints in her arms—shoulders, elbows, wrists, and fingers—making them limber like whips…!

C, could that be! A strike aimed at the skin, one of the vital points of the human body…!

“Shuri. Is my hearing playing tricks on me…? You said tofu, but it’s not boiled tofu… Could it be that you were making excuses…? May I ask you again?”

It’s over, those are the eyes of a murderer.

Moreover, Arius-san, who is usually supposed to be in the rear guard casting magic, has a masterfully formed striking posture using the whip-like motion of her arms, and if I were to be hit by that, it was obvious that the skin on my surface would burst and be covered in blood.

The space of the kitchen is enveloped by the two’s overwhelming presence. I want to faint from the sheer terror.

Ah, one of the subordinates fainted.

“Shuri, now, take the beef in your hands. If the tofu was a joke, you should be able to do it.”

“If it is tofu, take the pot and the water in your hands.”

I wonder, hasn’t this scenery become suitable for a picture of signing a contract with a pagan god or demon?

I feel an overwhelming aura behind the two of them…

But I won’t lose here!

“It is a healthy dish using tofu that is like a hamburger. It’s good for your stomach and your skin.”

“Shuri, let’s cook now. Is there anything we can help with?”

“Rir will do it too. Together for the first time in a while.”

Th, these guys…! Suddenly they have refreshing, kind smiles…!

“No, we will do it with the new recruits for their training, so please wait in the cafeteria…”

Before I could finish the sentence, Arius-san and Rir-san dashed out of the kitchen. It was like a storm. A typhoon. An existence that blows away everything around it as it leaves.

All that was left was us, standing there in a daze.

If I ever get to lecture them, I’ll add an extra hour. I etched that vow into my heart.

Now then, let’s make a dish using tofu this time.

“Shuri, what should we do?”

“Garn-san and Adora-san, please peel the potatoes and carrots.”

“Is that all right?”

“Basics are important, you know.”

I think peeling potatoes and carrots is good training to learn how to use a kitchen knife.

There is a lot to learn… force, angles, the danger of the knife, and so on. By cutting your hand, you become cautious and careful about how you use it.

Well, that side dish will be fine. I don’t know how long it will take Garn-san and Adora-san, but I’ll leave it to them, and I’ll start on the main dish.

“Ouch, I cut my hand!”

“Huh? There’s not much meat left… did I cut off too much of the skin?”

Correction, I have no choice but to help them when they’re done.

“Well then, everyone.”

I’ll hurry up with my part for their sake.

“Today, let’s make Tofu Hamburgers.”

Tofu is great boiled, great grilled, and great raw. It’s an amazing ingredient.

If boiled, it soaks up the stock; if grilled, it has a savory flavor and a juicy, meat-like texture; and if raw, you can pour soy sauce over it to make chilled tofu—there are so many ways to cook it.

This time, let’s go with the grilling method. I haven’t mentioned it, but I’ll be using beef, too.

In other words, this dish is hearty, using both beef and tofu, while still being healthy.

“That is the plan. Are you ready?”

“““Yes, Sensei!”””

“The ingredients we’ll use this time are mainly tofu, beef, nutmeg, sugar, salt, fish sauce, and potato starch.”

First, I add sugar, salt, and fish sauce—which removes the odor—to the beef, and mix it.

To that, I add the tofu and potato starch. The ratio is one block of tofu to two parts potato starch.

I mix this up and shape it.

“Please make it using this procedure. Also, know that beef shortages can be compensated for with tofu.”

“Understood, Sensei.”

“And also… Garn-san, Adora-san. Have you finished peeling?”

“No, not yet…”

Oh my, it seems they haven’t even finished ten yet. Garn-san has four, Adora-san has three.

I can’t wait for this.

“Everyone, please make the hamburger patties using the method I just showed you. I will help with the peeling.”

I left the rest to everyone else and took a knife to start peeling potatoes myself.

“Garn-san, if you try too hard to cut it thinly, it will actually take longer.”

I showed him how to peel the potatoes to set an example.

I turn the potato round and round, peeling off the skin.

When I finished peeling the skin in one continuous strip, Garn-san and Adora-san looked at me with stunned faces.

“What’s wrong?”

“N, no… that’s fast.”

“Is it? It’s just practice. You two will be able to do it soon, too.”

Saying that, I start on the second one. Time is precious, after all.

Whirl, whish, I peel the skin off. My mind is blank. I peel the skin with a blank mind, as if achieving enlightenment.

For some reason, doing this makes me feel like I’ve finally returned to the mercenary band.

Because when I was in jail, I never cooked for the people of the mercenary band like this.

Back then, it was only for eating with Garn-san, or for some trials of Lady Ecres, or I don’t know what else.

Well, as I was thinking about such things while peeling the potato skin, I noticed that there was nothing where I reached out my hand. Huh? I thought, and waved my hand, but I couldn’t grab anything in the basket.

When I took a look, there was nothing there.

“Oh? There’s nothing…?”

Oh dear, do I have to restock the potatoes?

“Isn’t that obvious? You finished all of them.”

When I looked next to me, Garn-san was looking at me with an exasperated face.

In his hand was a potato that was only half-peeled.

“Eh? I did?”

“Yeah, that was amazing.”

Adora-san also said, looking exasperated. In his hand was a potato that was only one-third peeled.

“You ignored us when we spoke to you, moving like a single potato-peeling machine. You peeled the skin at such incredible speed, and they were gone in the blink of an eye.”

“You’re exaggerating, Adora-san.”

“No, I’m quite serious. Look, the only remaining potatoes are the ones we’re holding, so do the rest of the work yourself.”

“Understood.”

“You have to do that… because my meager pride is shattered to pieces.”

Ah!? Adora-san’s face is dark, just like when we first met!

“Understood. I will leave the rest to you, so I will return over there. I’m counting on you.”

Did I shatter their confidence…? They have such unfocused eyes… Confidence can only be gained by gaining experience…

From now on, maybe I should avoid helping too much?

“Have you finished?”

“Yes, just like this.”

When I looked, the hamburger patties were indeed finished. I see, they were made beautifully, just as I taught them.

At this rate, they can be cooked without uneven burning.

“That’s excellent. Now, put them into a pan heated with oil.”

I kneaded the hamburger patties into individual portions and put them in the pan.

Making a nice sizzle sound, the Tofu Hamburgers started to cook.

“At this time, keep the heat low and put a lid on it. After about ten minutes, turn them over carefully so you don’t lose their shape. With that, the Tofu Hamburgers are finished.”

“Understood.”

“It’s a large quantity. We must hurry, but please don’t burn them.”

After all, this is for everyone from the captain-level members who are in this castle, to the security guards.

After the incident, the security guards who were originally in this castle and everyone from the mercenary band were organized into the same unit.

However, in these two units, some people are still at odds. I hear it’s mainly the veteran security guards and the new recruits from the mercenary band who are clashing.

So, when cooking, I try to be careful so that the delicious food can become a topic of conversation.

Something rare, or something that the veteran soldiers here are accustomed to.

This time I met the requests of Arius-san and Rir-san, but next time, I’ll have to be careful with the menu…

And the kitchen staff who were working in the castle until now have boycotted, and not a single one is left. Apparently, they can’t work with the kitchen staff of a barbaric mercenary band that came from the outside and took control. Sob.

Right now, we are managing with the kitchen staff from the mercenary band and people we recruited in a rush.

It’s tough, but it can’t be helped. I have to do something to get them to come back.

And there is also a food shortage in the castle.

We used a large amount of food to end the uproar, so it’s natural, but… there is some stockpiled food, not food that was originally stored for the factional disputes.

However, it was stockpiled with the calculation for the number of people who were originally working in this castle. With everyone from the mercenary band joining, the consumption has increased more than expected.

Making it into Tofu Hamburgers is one of the reasons, as we can’t secure enough beef for everyone.

I have to do something about it…

Thinking about such things, I am currently distributing the food to the soldiers gathered in the castle cafeteria. It’s a large room with long tables lined up.

The Tofu Hamburgers were made without any problems. The sauce is the fish sauce-based one I first served to Rir-san. This should go well too.

“Here you go, Rir-san, Arius-san.”

I served the Tofu Hamburgers to the two of them.

Both of them are expressionless. They look at what was served, concentrating intently.

I wonder… what are they doing?

“Shuri, is this a hamburger?”

“No, it’s a Tofu Hamburger.”

“It looks like… a hamburger, doesn’t it?”

Their faces turned puzzled, and I finally understood.

It looks like a hamburger, but it isn’t very fatty. But you can’t see the tofu.

So, I think they were judging whether this belongs to the hamburger category or the tofu category.

If not, I shouldn’t be feeling the power of a gaze that can see through everything… I shouldn’t be.

“You’ll know if you eat it.”

“I see… It’s Shuri’s cooking for the first time in a while. Let’s enjoy it.”

“Yeah, looking forward to it.”

The two of them, without knowing my internal struggle, picked up their forks and knives and started eating the Tofu Hamburger.

When they triumphantly put their knives in, both of them made puzzled faces.

“Somehow… the sensation is different.”

“That’s right. For a hamburger, the sensation is different. It’s somehow fluffy.”

“That’s right. Since I mixed beef and tofu, I think the sensation is different. Since the texture and taste are also different, I hope you enjoy that too.”

The two carried a piece of the Tofu Hamburger to their mouths just like that.

And then, they froze.

The two stopped, as if confirming the texture, taste, and flavor of the Tofu Hamburger in their mouths, and then they chewed and swallowed.

And then, they abruptly stood up and shook hands with each other.

What are you doing?

“Wonderful. The compatibility with tofu is good.”

“That’s right. This way, we won’t be taking in too much of the meat’s fat. The soft texture of the tofu blends well with the minced meat, finishing it even softer.”

“Furthermore, the compatibility with the sauce has improved. The refreshing sauce, which originally had outstanding compatibility with tofu, creates a synergistic effect by combining the hamburger and tofu together.”

“The fact that we were fighting is ridiculous, isn’t it?”

“Yes, it was a pointless dispute.”

I wonder, when did they become so close?

I didn’t think just combining tofu and hamburger would lead to this… Maybe I should calm them down with Tofu Hamburgers from now on if they start fighting?

Look, before I knew it, Rir-san and Arius-san were hugging each other?

“Peace is the best. Love & Peace, isn’t it?”

“That is correct.”

I have no idea anymore.

For now, let’s leave the two of them and return to my serving job.

I’m glad that the soldiers eating around them also seemed to be eating deliciously.

However, the food problem won’t be solved. At this rate, it will eventually run out.

Now then, what to do…

“Shuri! Are you there!?”

At that moment, Gungrave-san entered, opening the door to the cafeteria.

Walking with big strides, he walks straight toward me when he finds me.

“Oh, I thought you would be here because it’s lunchtime, and I’m glad. So you were here.”

“What is it, Gungrave-san? If it’s lunch, today it’s Tofu Hamburger.”

“That sounds delicious… no, no, that’s not what I’m talking about. It sounds delicious, but this is no time for that.”

“Is it?” Gungrave-san, who was about to continue, froze.

Hm? As I was thinking, “Why?”, there was a dense bloodthirst coming from behind!

“Tofu Hamburger is at such a level? Gungrave, do you want a scar on that neck that won’t go away?”

“Gungrave. This is a wonderful dish. It is wrong to make light of it.”

Rir-san is cracking her knuckles while doing preparatory exercises.

Arius-san is doing lunges.

Eh? Since when did these two become characters who use fists or kicks?

“N, no, my bad. Ah, my bad. So, please stop the roundhouse kick to the back of my knees, okay?”

You’ve been done in before?! Gungrave-san, is your married life okay?

“Ah, no, I have urgent business. You guys come too.”

“After we eat this.”

“Then hurry. This is truly urgent.”

“Did something happen?”

Gungrave-san said with a serious face.

“The Empress, Lenha Sunity, has been found.”

Eh? Empress… isn’t that the mastermind who complicated this incident?

Hearing those words, Rir-san and Arius-san made serious faces.

They are completely different from the people who were making a fuss about Tofu Hamburgers until just a moment ago.

“Really?”

“Yes. Rather than found, she was captured and is being brought here.”

“Captured? By whom?”

“Yes, Tebis Niewbist.”

Tebis… ah, the princess who was obsessed with Mapo Tofu, right? How nostalgic. Since when was that?

As I was thinking that way, Rir-san and Arius-san’s faces looked extremely unpleasant, or rather dark.

“That’s the worst…”

“Yes, will you come?”

“Understood. Rir, meals will be put on the back burner. If you really want to, do it while you can.”

“Understood.”

Eh? Is the situation more serious than I thought?

“Shuri.”

When I looked back after being called, Gungrave-san put his hand on my shoulder.

His face looks extremely painful.

“Something might happen to you, possibly. I will make the utmost effort, but that princess is the opponent. I might only be able to bring it to a draw, even me. I feel bad saying this just after you helped me… but I have to borrow your strength again.”

“Ha…”

I don’t really understand… but I’ll lend you as much strength as I have.

Well then, let’s go meet her.

Princess Tebis, for the first time in a while.