Chapter 52

Yesterday, following Hein’s attack, Lastiara had left for Huzya.

Based on her tone, I had assumed she would return quickly, but even after waiting until late into the night, she never showed her face.

Today was the eve of the Holy Birth Festival.

Even though it was still early morning, I could hear the voices of crowds outside. The town’s excitement seemed to be peaking as it moved toward the climax of the festival.

I sat up in bed to quench my parched throat. Forcing my sluggish body into motion, I made my way toward the living room.

When I opened the door to the lounge—I saw a girl clumsily breaking in through the window.

It was Lastiara.

I was startled, and she looked equally surprised as she gave me a small wave.

“Ah. G-good morning, Christ…”

“Oh, uh… morning.”

She probably hadn’t expected to run into me at this exact moment. Lastiara hurriedly entered the room and walked toward the storage area in the back.

I watched her as I tried to calm my racing heart. Apparently, she was scavenging for bread for breakfast.

With bread in both hands, Lastiara sat down at the living room table. I joined her and spoke up while she was stuffing her face.

“Lastiara, I want to talk…”

“Hm? Mmm-mff? A talk? Sure.”

“It’s about tomorrow’s Holy Birth Festival.”

“Uh-huh.”

Lastiara prompted my next words with a light, airy attitude. Watching her calmly, I asked the single most important question.

“Tomorrow… are you going to surrender your body to Saint Tiara?”

Even hearing that, Lastiara’s demeanor didn’t change. Not a single line of her flawless, artificial beauty wavered.

“Yeah. I am.”

She nodded in her usual casual tone.

Hearing that, my face contorted. My emotions were in such turmoil that even I could feel it. I struggled to maintain a facade of composure as I spoke.

“You say that so easily… but I heard that if you do, ‘Lastiara’ will disappear.”

“Ah, so you did end up hearing about it. Did Hein tell you?”

“Since you aren’t denying it, it must be true…”

I had wanted her to deny it. I had wanted her to laugh and tell me it was all a lie. If she had done that, I could have felt at peace and continued exploring the Labyrinth just like yesterday.

“I was keeping it a secret because I wanted to surprise you, though.”

“To surprise me…? This isn’t the kind of thing you use as a surprise!”

“I was looking forward to seeing the look on your face when you suddenly had Saint Tiara as an ally.”

“Looking forward to it…? You won’t even be there when that happens…”

The words were squeezed out of my throat. I felt like my voice was trembling. I couldn’t help but feel irritated at Lastiara for continuing the conversation with a smile, as if everything were normal.

“It’s okay, really. Saint Tiara is also me. Even if I become Saint Tiara, I’ll still be your ally. There’s no need to worry.”

Sensing my irritation, Lastiara assured me that our Labyrinth exploration wouldn’t be hindered. That tone-deaf remark only made my irritation grow.

“That’s not it!! That’s not what I’m talking about! I’m asking about the fact that once you become Saint Tiara, your consciousness will be gone, and you will vanish…! Do you actually understand that!?”

I couldn’t hold it back any longer and raised my voice.

“So they say. I know.”

But my outburst was brushed aside like a willow branch in the wind. Lastiara’s expression was as cool and quiet as a leaf drifting on a breeze.

“So they say…!? And you’re just okay with that!?”

“I am. …After all, my reason for living is to become one with Saint Tiara. I respect Saint Tiara. I think a hero who saved so many people is wonderful, and I love her life and her story. If I can become that hero, I have no complaints. I have no resistance to it. In fact, it’s an honor.”

Hearing that excessive devotion, Hein’s words came back to me.

—‘Fake.’

It was certainly a pure, madness-tinged devotion to Saint Tiara that felt like it could only have been manufactured.

“Isn’t that just because you were educated to think that way? Normally, if someone is told they’re going to disappear, they’d show at least a little resistance. Looking at you, it feels like you’ve simply been brainwashed.”

“…Yeah, you’re probably right. I know. I know that I’m biased. But this is who I am. Even if it’s education or brainwashing, this is me. Are you, too, going to deny everything I’ve lived for until today as just a ‘fake’ or a ‘fabrication’? Even though this is the only ‘me’ I have, are you going to deny it?”

Lastiara said she didn’t care if it was education or brainwashing. There was no hesitation there. She held her intentions clearly. She seemed to possess a flexible yet firm ego.

“…!!”

I was bewildered. I couldn’t find the boundary. I couldn’t tell where the ‘manufactured Lastiara’ ended and the ‘real Lastiara’ began, as Hein had described.

Because of that, I couldn’t bring myself to flatly reject her resolve. If I tried to deny the ‘manufactured Lastiara’ and ended up denying the ‘real Lastiara’ she was born as, I would lose everything.

I could only respond with desperate words.

“R-really? Are you truly okay with this?”

I pathetically repeated the same thing. Lastiara accepted it resolutely, looking me straight in the eye as she prepared to answer—

“Of course. I was born as a vessel for Saint Tiara, and I was raised as a vessel for Saint Tiara. My reason for living is to become Saint Tiara… there’s no doubt about that. That is…”

—As she repeated the words, a shadow fell across her face.

“That is… me…”

Lastiara showed a look of unease. Suddenly, she seemed unable to fully accept what she was saying, growing anxious.

Something similar had happened before. Back when we became allies at the tavern, her thoughts had shifted rapidly while we were talking. Lastiara visibly lost her confidence, losing sight of herself. Like a turbulent, murky sky, she fluctuated between sunshine and rain. That was Lastiara Huzya…

The ego I had thought was flexible was now wavering so much there was no trace of its former strength.

“That seems like me…”

As her eyes wandered, Lastiara muttered those words and fell silent. Seeing her like that, I understood the true nature of her instability.

In short, the instability was caused by the ‘manufactured Lastiara’ and the ‘real Lastiara’ encroaching upon one another. When the same problem was repeated, the two versions of her would clash and come up with different answers. That was also the source of the madness she carried.

“Seems like you…! Don’t you realize you don’t even know for sure? You’re wavering, you’re lost, and you don’t even know what’s right, do you?”

Thinking this was a perfect chance to make her reconsider, I added more words in rapid succession.

But in the next instant. A bright-faced Lastiara stood before me.

“—Hehehe. That’s not true at all! I’m going to become Saint Tiara. I’ll go on heart-pounding adventures, defeat powerful enemies, go through many meetings and partings, and become a hero that everyone admires. Just like that hero! It’s bound to be absolutely wonderful!”

The version of Lastiara that had tilted entirely to one side laughed with crazed eyes. Overwhelmed by her presence, I flinched. Even if I understood what was happening, I found myself speechless when faced with such a sudden transformation, as if she were possessed.

“It’s bound… to be… wonderful…”

And then, as expected, Lastiara became timid again.

“S-see! You’re unsure, aren’t you? You’re afraid of being sacrificed!”

“I have no fear. I’m not afraid of dying. Christ, you’ve seen me fight in the Labyrinth, haven’t you? I’m not so fragile that I’d cower over something like that.”

This time, she suddenly became assertive.

I felt a certain “condition” at play. Whenever I tried to deny tomorrow’s ritual, the ‘manufactured Lastiara’ inside her would emerge.

But this was just going in circles. No matter how many times we went back and forth, it always ended with the ritual, meaning I would never be able to persuade her.

—Lastiara had been made to be this way.

Faced with what Palinchron called the result of “constant adjustment,” I weakly repeated myself.

“…Are you really okay with this?”

“It’s not just my problem. Everyone at the Great Cathedral, everyone in Huzya—they’re all waiting for Saint Tiara! The hopes of the people are packed into this body!”

Lastiara shouted with a smile, answering—and quietly showing her will.

“That’s why I’m going through with the ritual.”

“…I still think you should refuse.”

I stated the opposite back at her. I knew it was futile, but I couldn’t help saying it. No matter how much we glared at each other, Lastiara showed no sign of bending her will.```

“Then why did you come here today? If you’ve already made up your mind, you didn’t need to come back to this house.”

I pointed out the contradiction in her actions. If she truly intended to offer herself up as a sacrifice tomorrow, there was no reason for her to sneak back into this house today.

Lastiara’s expression clouded over for a moment, but she immediately put on a smile.

“I just came to say goodbye. Also, I wanted to eat some of Maria’s cooking one last time. It’s better than the food at the Cathedral.”

“That’s a lie. If that were the case, you would’ve come through the front door. You sneaked in through the window because you didn’t want the people from the Cathedral—the people watching you—to find out.”

I drew closer to Lastiara.

“You’re running away, aren’t you? Even if it’s just for a little while, you wanted to get away from that ‘destiny’ of yours.”

“I-I’m not running away! I told you, I’m just here for the bread!”

Lastiara turned away, but her hand holding the bread was trembling.

She was afraid. No matter how much she had been educated or brainwashed, the ‘real Lastiara’ living inside her was terrified of disappearing. She was desperately clinging to this brief moment of freedom.

“Lastiara, come with me. Let’s leave this country. We can go to the southern nations Palinchron mentioned. If it’s the two of us, we can definitely make it.”

I grabbed her hand. Her skin was cold, like a stone.

“No… I can’t. If I leave, what will happen to the people of Huzya? What will happen to the prophecy? I… I have to become a hero.”

“A hero who dies before the story even begins isn’t a hero at all! That’s just a tragedy!”

My voice echoed through the room. Lastiara looked at me with eyes that seemed to be pleading for help, but then, the light in them changed again. The ‘manufactured’ side was taking over once more.

“Tragedies can be beautiful too, Christ. The story of a girl who gives her life for her country… it’s a classic, isn’t it?”

She laughed, a hollow, dry sound.

“I’m going back now. They’ll be looking for me soon.”

Lastiara stood up and walked toward the window.

“Wait! Lastiara!”

I tried to stop her, but she was faster. With the agility of a knight, she vaulted through the window and vanished into the morning mist of Wald.

I stood alone in the living room, the half-eaten bread still on the table.

My heart was racing, but not from fear. It was a cold, sharp anger.

They were all waiting for Saint Tiara? The hopes of the people were packed into her body?

What a load of crap.

They were just using a three-year-old girl as a convenient tool for their war and their prophecies. They were murdering ‘Lastiara’ to give birth to a ghost.

And I… I was about to let it happen.

Because I love myself too much, I won’t save her?

Palinchron’s words burned in my mind.

If I stayed here and did nothing, I would be able to continue my peaceful life. I could keep exploring the Labyrinth with Maria. I would be safe.

But I knew I would never be able to look at myself in the mirror again. Every time I saw a hero’s story, every time I saw a girl with golden eyes, I would be reminded of my own cowardice.

I couldn’t be a hero like the ones in Lastiara’s stories. I was just a high schooler from another world who wanted to go home.

But even a guy like me has things he can’t back down from.

“I’m going to destroy it.”

I whispered the words to the empty room.

“I’m going to destroy that festival, that prophecy, and everything else that’s trying to kill her.”

At that moment, for the first time since I came to this world, I felt a clear, unwavering fighting spirit. It wasn’t for the sake of survival, and it wasn’t for the sake of a wish.

It was simply because I wanted to save my friend.

I checked my equipment. The Heirloom Sword of House Alais was at my waist. My MP was full.

I walked out the front door, not as ‘Christ Eurasia,’ the quiet explorer, but as Kanami Aikawa.

The Holy Birth Festival was tomorrow.

There was no time to lose.