The Plucked Principal

There were quite a lot of Dried Fish, so everyone was able to divide them up generously among themselves.

At the darkening lakeshore, my team members, holding armfuls of dried fish, wore expressions as though they were in a fairy-tale land.

“I still… can’t quite believe it…”

“Up until now, we’ve teamed up with all kinds of classes during lessons, but…”

“Even when we teamed up with advanced-job classes, all that ever happened was that they worked us like dogs, and not a single good thing came of it…”

“And yet, when we teamed up with Leopin-kun, who everyone called a failure, we got to have this much fun, feel this happy, and eat this well…”

Their eyes glistened with tears as they spoke to me, deeply moved.

“Th-Thank you so much, Leopin-kun!!”

“You’re always helping me out with the farm work, so this much is only natural.”

And then, the end-of-day chime rang out.

“We had fun playing at the lake today. All right, let’s head back now.”

“Okaaay, Leopin-kuuun!”

The remaining members of Sir-sensei’s team were going wild on empty stomachs.

Some of them were even getting into fistfights, snapping their rods in half, or in desperation leaping into the lake.

“Guaaaah! Why can’t we catch even one fish!?”

“It’s all this gear’s fault! If it weren’t such trash, even I could’ve caught something!”

“Like hell it is! Team Trash Bastard’s rods were even trashier than ours!”

“And yet those guys got to eat all the fish they wanted, and they even have souvenirs on top of that!”

“Why are we, who are above them, the ones going hungry!?”

“Damn it damn it damn it! Daaamn iiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiit!!”

With warm, satisfied smiles, we left the lake in cheerful harmony.

Behind us, the howling screams of the losers echoed on and on without end.

Sir Vibe’s first day of classes after taking up his post ended in such total failure that it hardly needs saying.

According to the original plan, in the Leopin True Hell Marathon Game, Leopin was supposed to be beaten half to death.

On top of that, all of the prize money was supposed to be confiscated by Kakerukun.

It was supposed to be a complete set: Leopin, utterly battered in both body and spirit, crying his eyes out and wailing, “I’m quitting this academyyy!”

And yet… the ones crying and screaming were the schemers themselves.

Sir Vibe was not merely sent to the infirmary after nearly drowning in the lake.

The military boat he had used at the lake was one he had borrowed from the army division to which he belonged.

Capsizing it enraged the military authorities of the Leak Eight Kingdom.

And the punishment handed down to him, despite his having only just taken up his post, was the highest-class penalty possible.

An unbelievable three-rank demotion…!

Instructor Sir Vibe A ⇒ B

His achievements while in the military had been recognized, and for that reason he had received the exceptional A-rank evaluation for a physical education teacher.

If he had simply carried out his duties without incident for around a year, he was supposed to become vice principal just like that, but… that dream too had been shattered…!

All because he laid a hand on Leopin…!

“B… buhiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiin!?!?”

When Sir Vibe heard the news on a bed in the infirmary, he thrashed about like a broken massage machine.

And he ended up flattening the bed, which led to him being made to pay for it out of his salary as well.

However, the damage he suffered was still rather cute by comparison.

There was no need to even say who suffered the greatest damage this time.

In the principal’s office, Kakerukun was writhing about like an oversized baby that had tumbled out of its crib.

“Haaaan haaaan haaaan! Haaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!! One week after becoming principal, my money was supposed to have more than doubled, you know!? So why, why, why!? Why did this haaaapppeeeeeeeen!!”

Kakerukun’s profits and losses on the day Sir Vibe took office had been utterly disastrous.

Let’s go through them in order.

First, during the Leopin True Hell Marathon Game, he was knocked off a cliff on the way to the lake.

Then he took 50 million damage from the impact of the fall, which he paid with his holdings.

Kakerukun 7.4 billion ⇒ 7.35 billion

Then he became the cushion for the vice principal, who came falling right after him, for another 50 million damage.

Kakerukun 7.35 billion ⇒ 7.3 billion

Then Sir Vibe’s hip press, which became the finishing blow, broke his neck, dealing 100 million damage.

Kakerukun 7.3 billion ⇒ 7.2 billion

Next, in the Leopin Fishing Match Game at the lake, he was thrown from the capsized military boat and nearly drowned.

By the time help arrived, he had taken a cumulative 5 million damage.

Kakerukun 7.2 billion ⇒ 7.195 billion

And then came the greatest damage of all: defeat in the Leopin True Hell Marathon Game and the Leopin Fishing Match Game.

In total, 600 million…!

Kakerukun 7.195 billion ⇒ 6.595 billion

And because that money had been the wager for the games, it ended up going to Leopin…!

Special Training Class 902,950,000 Ender

With that, the accounting of losses was finally over… or so it seemed, but at the very end there was still another added expense.

In the Leopin Fishing Match Game, because he nearly drowned and was sent to the infirmary, he was docked one rank.

Naturally, there was no way Kakerukun could accept a rank reduction, so he paid the Board of Education 500 million to hush it up.

Kakerukun 7.195 billion ⇒ 6.095 billion

Unbelievably, Kakerukun had lost more than 1.9 billion in a single day—a catastrophic loss…!

For any proper gambler, it would have been a crushing defeat severe enough to drive him to hang himself.

Kakerukun had gone into respiratory distress from the shock of it and from raging too violently.

“Hah, hah, hah, hah…! I’m so frustrated…! So frustraaaated!!” Instead of increasing, my money is doing nothing but shrinking…! Ggggggh…! I won’t forgive this, I absolutely won’t forgive thisssss…! Leopin, now that it’s come to this, I’ll turn you into…! A total mess, a complete wreck, shredded to pieces, flat broke, stripped smooth and cleeeeeeeean!!”

Kakerukun screamed as he clawed at his own head.

…Zurin!

In both hands, he felt the sensation of yanking up a clump of grass clean out of muddy ground.

And there, unbelievably, was a fistful of hair…!

“Hah… hasaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaan!?!?”

Kakerukun had finally become Hagerukun…!

He was steadily following the fate of all those who picked a fight with Leopin.

That’s right… anyone who bears malice toward Leopin gets stripped of everything, right down to the hair on their ass…!

Even a legendary gambler once called the Man of Ten Billion is no exception…!

Truly terrifying, Leopin…!