An Ultra Super Cool Wepon

“It seems the next customer has arrived.”

The orc said without even turning around.

“What? Customers? Fuck, it’s those rookies who don’t know their place again!”

Only then did the skirt-wearing dwarf notice Solomon and Maya, and openly scowled.

“Rookies, this isn’t a place for the likes of you! No matter how much I say it, you idiots don’t get it, so at this rate I’ll have to hire a broker or something!”

The dwarf spat curses, and at that, the orc in a white suit turned his head.

“Understand the masters’ rudeness, fellow contractor.”

“…Fellow contractor?”

“Hotel Snark is a small place.”

The orc continued. Solomon swallowed quietly.

“Whether you like it or not, you end up distinguishing familiar faces from unfamiliar faces, and new faces. Especially when you ‘draw attention’ like you do.”

“…Did I do something that draws that much attention?”

“Who knows. I’m Gunther.”

“I’m Solomon.”

After they exchanged names, Maya beside him murmured under her breath when she heard it.

“Evangelist!”

‘…What, gospel?’

Surely she didn’t mean that church thing.

[Hotel Snark is overflowing with legends and big shots of every kind. And for the most part, they’re all psychos.]

“……”

[The long-term guest in Room 1004, Evangelist Gunther, is no exception. No, what gospel does an orc have? Amazingly, those who stand before his Holy Hammer shed tears of joy, and end up hearing a gospel they’ve never believed in their entire lives.]

The orc grabbed that holy gospel hammer with one arm and spun it around, then Koong! set it down on the floor.

Just setting it down lightly made the floor feel like it shook. He couldn’t even dare to guess its weight.

…It really was a deranged kind of gospel.

“You always work hard. I’ll be counting on you after the next ‘service’ as well.”

“Hmph. If it’s worth it.”

The dwarf answered curtly. The orc in the white suit adjusted his grip on the hammer and immediately turned his back.

As he passed, Solomon glanced at his profile and thought.

‘He’s strong.’

The intimidation that could be felt, the presence, the strength that made the difference overwhelming just by looking. So he carefully turned his head.

Gunther’s back, as he walked away, exposed before Solomon. To see that dignified-looking back.

‘….’

After looking, Solomon let out a hollow laugh.

He couldn’t see anything.

On a back that should be more exposed than ever, there wasn’t a single opening. It was as if there were eyes on his back—

A mountain, through and through.

Without realizing it, a few drops of cold sweat ran down. An overwhelming gap in rank he couldn’t even dream of crossing.

He had only imagined it lightly, yet it felt like blood-soaked psycho angels were shimmering overhead, playing gospel metal together.

‘Room 1004… That’s a top-tier powerhouse even within Hotel Snark.’

How much stronger would he have to become to close that gap. How many more levels would he have to gain?

Honestly, he couldn’t even guess.

“What, you’re still hanging around? Let me tell you, I don’t care if you’re some Hotel Snark contractor or whatever….”

“I was told to show you this.”

Solomon walked up to the grumbling dwarf and held something out.

The reward Yuria gave him, a modification ticket for an automatic crossbow usable at the Deadlock Guild’s weapon workshop.

And in the form of a promissory note bound by a geas.

“Hah, another half-baked punk got scammed hard and brought some ticket or whatever….”

The skirt-wearing dwarf snatched it without even looking and tried to tear it with all his strength.

At the instant his thick, burly hands were about to rip the paper apart.

Flinch.

The dwarf’s movement stopped dead. His eyes rolled back. His cheek muscles started twitching like a seizure.

Before long, countless veins were bulging up on both hands clutching the paper. It was blatantly abnormal to the naked eye.

“G, g….”

In that state, the dwarf’s lips moved with difficulty. The promissory note that should have been torn in his hands was now emitting seven rainbow colors, like passing through a prism spectroscope.

It wasn’t light you could dismiss as merely pretty. The dwarf’s eyes were shining with the same rainbow colors.

Even his lips, nostrils, ears, all the holes on his body began to shine with that rainbow iridescence.

The light itself was a warning radiance.

“G, gea… g, gea, geas…!! Aghk, agagaghk, giiiiagagagaghk!!”

Geas. Only then did the three syllables spill from the edge of the dwarf’s lips with difficulty. After those syllables, he began convulsing like he’d been shocked by electricity.

In an instant, sound disappeared from the workshop.

The Kkang, kkang hammering that should have rung out heavy, the sounds of melting metal into molten iron and casting it, the steam sounds ringing as red-hot metal was quenched.

The sooty breathing, the metal friction with sparks flying, every sound that should exist in a workshop—

All of it stopped.

As if the workshop itself had suddenly stopped breathing.

Before long, the dwarf wasn’t just having rainbow-colored blood pouring out of his seven orifices, he was retching up rainbow-colored vomit as well.

“Kuhuk, huk, heeugh! Aghk, ehk, ehheuk!!”

“Wow, you’re really doing your bullshit in rainbow, avant-garde style.”

“Uuup, uwek, gehoooook!!”

Calm returned in the blink of an eye. The worker dwarves went right back to making noise and working.

“Kraaaagh! You damn bastard! You should’ve said it was a geas from the start!”

“You should’ve listened to the end when people talk, from the start.”

Solomon answered with ‘a rough mouth.’ Because it didn’t help to be looked down on.

“Yeah, you damn bastard. A promise is a promise! So, what weapon are you going to modify?”

Without a word, Solomon took out the automatic crossbow he had stored in his Quick Loader Belt.

“A Bladeforge Workshop Nightfall XR—10 model.”

As it clicked into shape with its mechanical expansion structure, the skirt-wearing dwarf said the model name without a moment’s delay.

“Hah! You want to modify a weapon like that here? That’s pearls on a pig’s neck.”

“Hey, Solomon.”

Seeing that, Maya carefully opened her mouth.

“Like he says, one option is to prepare a better weapon and request the modification. You could save it for later. As you know, the value of that note….”

“……”

Solomon was silent for a moment. Rationally, it would be better to get better equipment and request the modification on that.

Then, without thinking, the elf broker Yuria’s words came to mind.

‘Before the next contract, please use it on the Nightfall automatic crossbow you are using now.’

The Nightfall automatic crossbow he was using now. Before the next contract.

Yuria had held out the modification ticket and pointed directly at the automatic crossbow he was using now. Not telling him to buy new gear. She had even clearly specified when he had to use it.

From what she had shown so far, it surely wasn’t something she said for no reason.

“No, I’ll do it with this.”

“Tch, I figured you would….”

“Is there a problem?”

“Hmph. Not really.”

At Solomon’s answer, the dwarf blacksmith grumbled like it was nothing surprising.

“By the laws of the geas, I swear on the name of Dvergr, god of us dwarves, god of great mountains, mines, and metal, god of hearths, furnaces, and anvils—!”

The grumbling soon turned into a solemn voice of oath.

“Our Deadlock Guild, in exchange for the extinguishing of an ancient debt, will, per contract, carry out a Type-A modification of the weapon workshop on the Nightfall XR—10 automatic crossbow!”

And with that, something astonishing happened. The modification ticket in the dwarf’s hand emitted rainbow light again, then turned into particles like ash and scattered.

“Hoo. No matter how many times I do this shit, I never get used to it.”

After finishing the oath, the skirt-wearing dwarf grumbled.

“Then, I’ll explain our workshop’s Type-A modification.”

After saying it, he snatched Solomon’s Nightfall automatic crossbow as if stealing it. The movement itself was visible, but Solomon didn’t bother resisting and let him take it.

“First, additional specs and tuning from the modification will be done 100% autonomously according to the Deadlock Guild’s technical philosophy, and any separate customer requests or demands are absolutely impossible.”

It wasn’t particularly surprising. This much was expected from these stubborn masters.

“Second. Type-A modification is an act that carries the technical honor of the Deadlock Guild and the weapon workshop, so you have the obligation to enter a ‘geas’ that prohibits transfer or sale to third parties, and the leakage of techniques.”

“Like this deal right now.”

“…Yeah.”

At Solomon’s words, the dwarf twisted his face and continued.

“Third, the modified weapon officially becomes a ‘work’ of the Deadlock Guild, and receives the same treatment as this workshop’s works. Service, repairs, inspections, maintenance, not a single exception.”

“I understand.”

Hearing it like this, it truly couldn’t have been better.

“So, about how long will it take until the modification is finished?”

“It takes about 10 minutes and 19 seconds.”

“……”

“Of that, 9 minutes and 7 seconds are spent preparing the geas. I’ll prepare the ritual, so wait a moment.”

“…What?”

Before Solomon could even reply from sheer disbelief, the dwarf left his spot.

‘Then that means there’s 1 minute and 12 seconds left. Who the hell are you messing with right now?’

Subtraction even an elementary schooler could do.

For all the grand talk about honor and works, it was absurdly quick. So fast it almost wiped out the trust he’d had until a moment ago.

‘Maybe it wasn’t something to make such a fuss over, like I thought?’

That was when.

[People have a few misunderstandings about masters. Like saying a great calligrapher doesn’t choose his brush, or that a potter smashes pottery countless times until it pleases him and does not compromise…….]

As if he’d been expecting it, the narrator in his head started rattling on.

“Oh, right.”

The dwarf who had left to “prepare the geas” appeared again and spoke.

“This crossbow looks like it’s been magically integrated with a quick loader belt. Hand it over. I’ll fix that up too.”

Come to think of it, the quick loader belt had an enchantment that let you swap cartridges with a single wrist snap.

“Thanks.”

“Hmph. Don’t thank me.”

The dwarf answered curtly.

“A geas goes both ways. In exchange for you fulfilling your oath, we stake the guild’s and workshop’s technical honor. Do you think we want rainbow nosebleeds for doing a half-assed job?”

“When someone who’s had it happen says that, it doubles the trust.”

[In truth, a master’s virtue is not being incapable of compromise. It is knowing exactly the point where you must compromise.]

With the voice in his head, the skirt-wearing dwarf in front of him disappeared with the automatic crossbow and quick loader belt.

About eight minutes later, the dwarf returned with a scroll like ancient Egyptian papyrus.

“Heh-heh, a dwarf-style geas. Simple. I like it.”

Seeing it, Maya burst into laughter. Solomon didn’t know why she was laughing, but soon understood what her laughter meant.

“Hmph. Don’t lump us in with runts like gnomes.”

The dwarf grumbled curtly and unrolled the scroll.

「HEY!! ILL CHANG UR WEPN INTO AN ULTRA SUPER COOL WEPN!!
SO U DONT GIV IT 2 OTHR PPL WHEN UR RLY COOL!!!]

It was a ridiculous sentence written huge, like an elementary school kid’s sloppy diary.

[Dwarves understand the virtues of a good contract. It’s easy and clear.
Unlike gnome or goblin-style contracts that cram tiny worm-crawl handwriting with dozens of pages of clauses stuck on.]

“If you want the modification, agree on your soul.”

“Ah, uh….”

It was a solemnity that didn’t match the ridiculous sentence.

“I agree.”

When Solomon answered, he suddenly felt a pressure like something was gripping his heart.

“Good. The oath is established with this.”

The dwarf answered calmly and split the scroll in two.

After tearing it, he handed Solomon the part that said, “HEY!! ILL CHANG UR WEPN INTO AN ULTRA SUPER COOL WEPN!!”

Then he took the “SO U DONT GIV IT 2 OTHR PPL WHEN UR RLY COOL!!!” side and left his spot again.

About two minutes later, the dwarf showed up again.

“Here. The modification is finished safely.”

“……”

With the Nightfall automatic crossbow and quick loader belt Solomon had handed over.

It was absurdly fast.

And once he got it back, honestly, he couldn’t even tell what had changed. So as he forced himself to stay composed, it was Maya who broke the silence.

“No way…!”

“Hmph. At least this young lady has something better than knot-holes attached. I can leave the annoying explanation to you, yeah?”

Watching Maya make a fuss, the dwarf snorted.

‘…Can she tell what changed?’

In barely over a minute.

Maya’s eyes were different as she looked at the automatic crossbow and belt that had been taken and brought back like lightning.

‘Her eyes are different?’

[Insight Success!]

At that moment, somewhere, there was the sound of dice rolling.

[Her eyes were different. Not figuratively, but optically. It is a retinal modification procedure called a kaleidoscope. The Solomon of the past knew that fact.]

‘The past.’

Once again, that word seized Solomon’s consciousness. The House of Bale, a bastard, born in a red-light district. A filial son and a mother. A few keywords gathering like a pile, waiting to be threaded together.

Getting lost in those thoughts was only for an instant.

As they left the Deadlock Guild’s underground passage, Maya chattered like a child, showing that there was a reason for her fuss.

The words 「ultra super cool weapon」 were not a bluff.

To the point he didn’t know what to do because he wanted to test it immediately.