Chapter 58

I had a decent gift of gab, and with that, I could spin nothing into something and dress up something into a gripping, larger-than-life tale for my audience.

The story of how Kate gave me the quest to escort Goldie. The story of how I butted heads with Goldie the moment we met. And the stories from each labyrinth floor and its hallway towns.

Of course, side effects crept in—like how the already trashy Goldie got upgraded in my telling into downright nuclear waste; how magnanimous, big-hearted me graciously forgave the petty hazing and gatekeeping¹ from my underqualified party members; and how everyone except Goldie was so moved that they burst into tears going “You’re the best!” while clinging to my ankles… but hey, what could I do?

Storytelling, by nature, got warped the moment it passed someone’s lips and bent to the speaker’s intent. If they didn’t like it, they could resurrect and come yell “It’s rigged!” themselves.

From there, the tale moved on to our run-in with the bandit party, the crisis we faced, and my spectacular save that pulled us through—until the part where that punk shoved his lifesaver into a trap and popped a Return Stone to escape. Low groans trickled from all around.

“…Ugh.”

“So that happened…”

“Vile…”

“That’s what worn-out mercenaries would do… tch.”

“And now, I’ll summon witnesses to confirm that everything I’ve stated is true.”

“I’m Illeia Bijou, the party’s priestess.”

“I-I’m Selan Cotin, the party’s archer.”

I wrapped it up after about ten minutes more by having Sensible and Timid give supplementary testimony.

“…After barely escaping the trap with our lives, Illeia, Selan, and I withdrew from the site and spent some time healing and resting. After exchanging opinions, we decided to retrace our steps back to the 5th-floor hallway town. It was the safest route available.”

“Hm…”

“But whether by coincidence or because the high gods couldn’t overlook those scum and sent punishment… we found this on the way back.”

I pulled from the Hero’s Backpack the blood-soaked, ragged clothes (Timid’s fault, obviously) and a broken scabbard, and set them down.

“They were Hank Aduhn’s clothes and scabbard.”

“Mmm…”

For maximum effect, I called the last witness—Sparks.

“Scala.”

On my cue, Scala dipped her head with a faintly pained look.

“Hello. I’m Scala Evitz, the party’s mage and once a retainer to Young Master Hank.”

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“…That’s how it was. I was forced to go along with the Young Master’s plan, but… as a person and as a party member, I knew it was wrong. So I tried to persuade him several times. But… in the end I couldn’t change his mind.”

“In the end, the Young Master sprung the trap on Mr. Sword God—no, Mr. Go Geom-shin—then abandoned the two party members who condemned his cowardice, taking only me and Cheche, and escaped with a Return Stone. He didn’t swing the killing blow himself, but it was murder in all but name.”

“After we returned to the hallway town, the Young Master rested briefly, left me there, and went back with Cheche to the trap site. He said he had to confirm whether Mr. Go Geom-shin was dead, and if he survived, to finish the job. He left me behind, I think, because I had opposed the plan from the start. And that… was the last I saw of him.”

I picked up from Sparks and ended the account.

“Hank Aduhn and his retainer Cheche Goslon were likely attacked by monsters and either eaten or dragged off. Considering the stripped clothing, being eaten is more probable. He must have assumed there’d be no fresh monsters on a route we’d already cleared and walked in relaxed… In the end, all he left behind were those blood-soaked clothes and a broken scabbard.”

“Mmm…”

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Silence fell when my statement ended.

About three minutes later, someone cleared their throat with an annoyed “Ahem,” lifted his head, and spoke.

“That is… difficult to accept.”

A middle-aged wolfkin—one of the Nangin—smoothed his impressive mustache and spoke in a calm tone.

“I know Young Master Hank well. I’ve watched him since he was very small. In my view, he’s not that kind of person.”

“Pardon me, but who are you?”

“I’m Ludoran, affiliated with Central University’s Seol Campus. I chair the Department of Magical Engineering.”

“…Huh?”

There was indeed a university with that name tacked onto the edge of the District 3 guildtown.

Tacked on, sure, but…

“Why is a university professor with no relation to the Guild sitting here listening to my testimony?”

“No relation? How so? The District 3 Adventurer’s Guild is not merely an adventurer bureau—it administers all of District 3 on behalf of His Lordship, Viscount Seol. Which means our campus inside the guildtown is likewise under the Guild’s umbrella. In other words, I’m Guild personnel.”

Kate, seated beside me, leaned in to whisper.

“He’s close with Baronet Aduhn. Sounds like he happened to be here on business, heard the brat died, and rushed over.”

“Ah…”

When you thought about it, the only reason this kind of summary hearing had been convened at all was because a local notable’s second son had died. It would be stranger if those with ties to the baronet didn’t stick their faces in.

If the dead had been some passing commoner adventurer A, there wouldn’t be any hearing—Kate would’ve gone, ‘Oh, that happened? Well, good riddance, what a bastard~’ scribbled a few lines on a form, and called it a day.

I whispered back to Kate.

“Anyone else like him?”

“I can’t claim to know everyone, but… that dwarf elder with the tied hair over there, and that human lady with glasses over there—they’re likely. Both are Guild executives… I heard they owed the baronet favors back in the day.”

“I see. So at least three people here are against me.”

While I was murmuring with Kate, Mustache-Wolf gave me a sour look and spoke again.

“Are you ignoring me?”

“Ah, my apologies. So, you’re saying that piece of trash wasn’t actually trash?”

“…Young man. Watch your tongue. Young Master Hank is not someone to be insulted so lightly.”

At that, one of the two elderly priests I’d asked to attend slammed the table and shot to his feet—the priest was from the Lumina Church.

“Impertinent! How dare a mere university professor slight the authority of Her Holiness Glaphina, Pontiff of the Lumina Church!?”

The old priest of Kanan followed, half-lidded eyes narrowing at the professor.

“I am offended as well. That pilgrim priest there—pardon me, your name was… I heard it, but it was a bit difficult.”

“Go Geom-shin.”

“Right. In any case, Go-u Con-shin here swore an oath in the name of his god as a priest. Do you truly not understand what it means to invoke a god’s name?”

Pressed by two elders who clearly carried weight, Professor Lu-something broke out in a cold sweat.

“O-of course I do. However…”

“No, you do not. For a priest, to swear by a god’s name is to lay one’s spirit, flesh, and entire life upon the scale. To treat such a heavy and noble oath as a lie and plant the seed of doubt…”

“That’s not what I—”

“At this point, I must ask you instead. Are you perhaps harboring a… different view of the high ones of the Celestial Realm than we do?”

“Pardon? What do you mean…?”

After a moment of fumbling, Mustache finally realized what the priest’s lofty roundabout jab had implied, and he nearly jumped out of his seat.

“I—I’m no heretic! I’m a devout follower of Lord Vituus, god of water! I attend church every weekend without fail—how could you accuse me of something so dreadful!?”

Cold sweat poured down as he imagined a friendly visit from the Inquisitors. The Lumina priest leaned in with a soft but sharp edge to his voice, a coaxing threat in disguise.

“Is that so? Then why would such a devout man dare disgrace the name of Her Holiness Glaphina?”

“…M-my words were too rash. I’ll be more careful from now on.”

“…We’ll be watching.”

Oh, that was beautiful. Exactly why I’d invited them in the first place. Good—my side was holding steady.

Now, time to hammer the nail in. This was why I’d delayed presenting my evidence until now.

“Brother, may I speak?”

“Of course. Please, Pilgrim Priest.”

“As someone who’s spent much time in the secular world, I can somewhat understand our professor’s doubts. We priests constantly feel Her presence, but those who’ve only heard Her word might naturally think differently. Even Lumina herself said we should teach and open the eyes of the ignorant, not simply scold or condemn.”

“Mm. That’s the teaching from Salron, Chapter 7.”

For the record, I had no idea what Salron 7 even was. But scriptures were full of lofty sayings—you threw one out at random, and it usually stuck somewhere.

I nodded sagely as if I’d known it all along and continued.

“With that in mind, I’ve prepared certain pieces of evidence to help convince such secular folk. Let us view these first, then continue our discussion.”

I projected the recording Shia had captured.

-Scala. Scala…!

-Hank… ah…!

“Ho…”

“My word…”

“Cough, cough…”

“C-could you raise the volume a bit…?”

“I can’t see it well—does that artifact have a zoom function?”

“Pant, pant… recording… must record…”

Hey. Forget the video, listen to the conversation! And whoever that last guy was—just go home.

Anyway, with Hank’s scheming and betrayal laid bare, the mouths of those who’d been defending him clamped shut like clams.

“Wait a moment, Mr. Con-shin, was it? I have a few questions.”

…So there was still one left.

I gestured to the two priests glaring indignantly to let them know it was fine, then gave a nod to the bespectacled woman who had shouted,

“It’s rigged!”

“Go ahead.”

“First of all, who took this video? The level of stealth required to film such clear evidence is… difficult to believe.”

She wasn’t attacking my testimony outright, but picking at details. If the details fell apart, the whole testimony would look less credible. A clever way to dodge the priests’ pressure.

But you think I didn’t prepare for that?

“Scala herself filmed it.”

“Yes. I recorded it.”

“A-ah, but why?”

“I told you—I wasn’t fond of such schemes. I thought if I had evidence like this, I could use it to rein in Young Master Hank if he went too far. I lacked the courage to actually do it, but that was the plan.”

“So… you meant to use it as blackmail?”

“Yes. You could put it that way.”

“V-very well, but… you filmed it right in front of him. Did the Young Master really allow that?”

“We sometimes filmed ourselves when… engaging with each other. He must have assumed this was just another of those.”

Her calm answer left the room choking on awkward coughs.

“By Lumina…”

“What a corrupt generation…”

“Truly, what’s wrong with young people these days…”

“Bold…”

“Wow, I’m jealous. Think I could ask her for her comm-sphere number…?”

Seriously, who was that last guy? Wasn’t he the same one panting earlier?

Sensing this line of questioning wasn’t going anywhere good, the bespectacled woman hurried to change the subject.

“Very well. Just one more question. Mr. Con-shin, was it? I heard you fought off both the bandits and the swarm of monsters from the trap all on your own, with only a sword. How is that even possible? Ah, I don’t mean to doubt your testimony, of course. I’m simply curious, yes—curious on a personal level.”

I gave a faint smile and answered in a single word.

“Well.”

“…Excuse me?”

“You just do it well.”

“…That doesn’t explain anything. Besides, you’re a priest. How could a priest, not even a Steel Body user, accomplish such feats—”

“And why do you assume it’s impossible?”

“Well, that’s simple common—”

Whoosh!

Before she could finish, I conjured a fireball in my palm.

“Here. This is magic. Is it common sense for a priest to use magic?”

“…!”

“…!!”

“……!!!”

“There is nothing impossible in this world. Don’t make the mistake of trying to measure everything by your own pitiful standards.”

Her face flushed scarlet. I pressed the advantage.

“And why should I prove anything to you? You yourself said you weren’t doubting me, only asking out of curiosity. If I don’t answer your curiosity, does that make the oath I swore in Lumina’s name false?”

“…!”

“So let’s leave it at that. I’m the victim here. Strictly speaking, this isn’t even a trial of my guilt—it’s a denunciation of Hank Aduhn’s crimes.”

“Ghh…”

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“And on that note…”

I swept my gaze across the tongue-tied crowd, then handed the Recording Artifact I’d been holding to the Vice Guildmaster.

“Why are you giving this to me?”

“A gift. It comes with Master Falun of the Splitting Flame Tower’s seal of guarantee. If anyone claims the video is fake, just flash that.”

“Hm?”

“When children go astray, the blame falls on the parents. Personally, I suspect there are certain people who’d be terrified of this footage leaking. Wouldn’t it be useful as leverage?”

“Wait, you mean…”

“And I hear that fellow doesn’t exactly obey the Guild. This could serve as a handy switch to smack him with. Wave it in his face and he’ll probably shake like a leaf.”

Understanding dawned, and the Vice Guildmaster burst out laughing.

“Ku-ku-kuh! I see, I see. So that’s where this story’s heading. Hah! A fine gift indeed, clever pilgrim priest. So? What do you want in return?”

“Nothing much. Just that I won’t be bothered further about this matter. If the Guild backs my testimony, what can a mere village headman do?”

“That goes without saying. Anything else?”

“Well, in that case, just pay me a bit more for the quest reward. I’ll take it without complaint.”

“Hah! Excellent. Truly an amusing fellow. Very well—I’ll see you get your gift’s worth.”

“Oh, and please make a couple of copies to send to the Lumina Church and Kanan Church branches in Seol.”

The two priests widened their eyes.

“Eh? To us? Why?”

“You see, Illeia is affiliated with Kanan’s temple in Ferom. This incident will surely trouble her church. With this, they won’t have to suffer. And I hear the church’s been getting meager support from its lord lately… Having this will turn his purse strings into a bottomless spring.”

The Kanan priest broke into a broad smile.

“Indeed. Thank you. I’ll gladly accept such a consideration.”

I turned to the Lumina priest, whose eyes were already gleaming with anticipation.

“And as for Lumina’s church, I hear you haven’t been able to establish one in Ferom yet. Why not use this chance to plant a great church there? I’m sure Baronet Aduhn will foot the bill.”

The old Lumina priest laughed heartily.

“Excellent. Very good! We had nearly given up, with the lord’s stingy refusals… but this, yes, this is surely Lumina’s will! No wonder Her Holiness Glaphina appointed you. Ha-ha-ha!”

I gave the Vice Guildmaster and the two priests a small, knowing nod.

“If you found my gift useful, I hope we’ll continue in good faith from here on.”

“If any trouble arises, speak with Kate. I’ll help however I can.”

“Of course, Brother. In Lumina’s name, come to me anytime. I won’t turn you away.”

“Though our churches differ, I’m glad to know such a faithful brother. Should you ever face a burden, come seek counsel.”

Perfect. That’s how you built connections.