My Childhood Friend And Halloween

According to my childhood friend: “Something like a maid outfit, I can just about pull off as a joke — but the real costume-y stuff, animal ears and the like, just isn’t me. How do I put it… partway through I come back to my senses and go, ‘what’s a former dude even doing in this getup.’”

…or so she says.

If anything, a maid outfit strikes me as the bigger crowd-pleaser of the two… though come to think of it, the one she wore that time at Refrain was a pretty prim and proper maid getup.

For what it’s worth, when I pressed her right then and there about why the fake animal ears and such were off-limits, she told me:

‘If I were a genuine girl it’d be one thing, but in my case I’ve got the past-life experience on top of it, so I’ll suddenly catch myself looking at myself from the outside and think, “Yikes…” or something.’

…or so she claims.

For context: by Ayu’s own reckoning, past life included, her total life experience adds up to something north of thirty years.

Given that, a thirty-something doing the animal-ears bit is… yeah, maybe a bit much, and when that thirty-something happens to be her own self, sure, the mental image would do some damage.

The logic, I get.

But if that’s the standard, the same ought to go for the maid outfit. What does this girl make of the way she carries herself the rest of the time…? I can’t be the only one left wondering. …Wait, does that mean she plays the maid part completely straight?

In any case, my childhood friend, Sakura Ayuri, and her forever-inscrutable sense of exactly where to draw a line. As for what she was up to right now…

“Pumpkin pudding — they sell it at supermarkets and stuff this time of year, right?”
“Yeah, they do. See it at convenience stores a lot too.”

We sell it where I work, too.

“So like, before you buy it you think ‘ooh, nice and seasonal~ looks tasty,’ and you buy it, but then you actually eat it and of course it tastes like pumpkin, so unless you actually like pumpkin you kinda end up going ‘…yep!,’ don’t you?”
“Apologize. To the pumpkin farmers of the world.”

Says the one who brought it up… though in this case, is it the farmers she should apologize to, or whoever made the pumpkin pudding…? Both, probably.

Anyway, time flew, and the world had taken on a Halloween air. In the supermarket the shelves were lined with Halloween-print snack packaging; the convenience stores had their Halloween sweets out on display. Which naturally meant Ayu, who lives to seize on this kind of event as an excuse to have fun, piped up with a ‘Let’s do somethiiing!,’ and so this year we’d ended up throwing a little Halloween party at Hina’s place.

“Whatever you do, don’t say that in front of Senior Hotaru, okay?”
“Agreed…”
“She’d totally get all mopey~”
“…Ah, no, that’s not it!? It’s not like I’ve got a problem with this particular pumpkin pudding or anything…!”

What did she mean, ‘that’s not it’? Said while holding a pumpkin pudding Senior Hotaru had made with her own two hands.

We’d gathered under the banner of a Halloween party, but it wasn’t actually Halloween yet. Ayu was scheduled to work on the day itself, so we’d bumped the party up early. What we were eating was the pumpkin pudding that Refrain, Ayu’s workplace, was rolling out for three days only, the day itself included, which made today a taste-test besides.

“How do I put it… right, this was about the pumpkin pudding I bought at the supermarket the other day, see? And I wanted to say that compared to that, Hotaru’s is super delicious…”
“Ahh… so that’s it…”
“Knowing that senior~… I bet she’d see right through what you’re getting at, Ayu, and then pretend to be all mopey anyway~”
“Might even throw in some fake crying for good measure.”

And then, once Ayu started flailing through her excuse, Senior Hotaru would go:

‘I have been deeply wounded by Ayu’s heartless remark. I demand an apology.’

I could just picture her launching into some bizarre demand like that.

◆◆◆

“Getting together like this, chatting over snacks, is nice and all~…”

“…”

— Flinch.

“But when it comes to Halloween, it’s gotta be costumes, right~?”
“Well, we do it every year.”
“Mine’s not all that elaborate… is that okay?”

“…”

“It’s fine, it’s fine, it’s not like it’s for anyone else to see. Mine’s always bare-bones anyway, like… …Ayu?”
“…Wh-what is it?”
“No, just, you went quiet all of a sudden…”

The moment the topic turned to costumes, my usually-noisy childhood friend clammed right up. Naturally that caught my attention. I hadn’t meant much by it, but my light prodding had clearly rattled her, her eyes darting around all too obviously.

“This year you were all fired up going ‘I’ve got part-time money now, so I’ll get mine myself!,’ huh, Ayu~. I can’t wait~”
“Ahh… I did say that, didn’t I…”

It struck me as unusual for Ayu, too: every year she either throws something together from the hundred-yen store or just wears whatever Hina or Senior Hotaru hands her.

“…”
“…Don’t tell me you’re about to say you didn’t get anything ready.”

The reason Hina and the others had ended up choosing Ayu’s costume last Halloween came down to two things: how slapdash she usually is about picking clothes, and how lazy her costume the year before that had been. Nothing but some bandages wound haphazardly around her head. I still remember it. And last year, the upshot of leaving it entirely to the two of them was that Ayu got stuffed into a calculatedly cute cat costume (really more of a cosplay outfit), the kind she’d never have picked for herself, and the incredible face she made over it has stuck with me ever since.

And yet, after all that, she shows up as a gyaru at the start of second term, and not long after starts wearing a maid outfit at work. So, honestly: where on earth does this girl draw her lines?

“N-no! I did get something ready! I did!”
“Ohh…? Then you can go last, Ayu. I’ll start, then…”
“Eh.”

She’d been pumped enough to declare she’d cover it with her own part-time money, so my few-hundred-yen effort was better off going first.

“Well, mine’s just the usual cat-ear headband and all.”
“Judge Hina! If this is allowed, then why wasn’t I let off the hook the year before last!?”
“The year before last, you just wrapped some white bandages you bought at the drugstore around yourself, Ayu~. If you’d at least dirtied them up a little and done some makeup, it’d have been fine~”
“Damn it! I can’t argue with that!”

Add a tail, draw on a few whiskers, and there we have it: no danger of a repeat of last year’s Ayu. As for that shoulder-baring number they’d stuffed her into last year, every last stat point dumped into “cute”… well, even I wouldn’t much want to wear that one.

“Then next… is it okay if I go?”
“Go ahead, go ahead~”
“I… got this — a witch’s hat and cape.”
“Oooh, a little witch! Cute!”
“I-I haven’t put it on yet… …hup. How’s this?”
“It’s cute!”
“Cute~”
“Yeah, I think it’s good.”
“Y-yeah… thanks.”

Sumire stood there in the pointy hat that instantly says “witch” and a black cape. This much effort was probably what counted as normal. Or, more precisely, just about right.

“Alright, next up is Hina, heeere we go~! I’ll just go change real quick~”
“Off you go~”

Unlike the rest of us, she was heading off to change. Being her house helped, but it seemed Hina had really gone all out this year.

The door clicked softly shut, leaving the rest of us in the living room. My eyes, and Sumire’s, went straight to Ayu, who so plainly looked like she’d done something she shouldn’t have.

“…”

“So, by the way, Ayu.”
“…What is it.”
“Did you really get something ready?”
“I did! Look at this huge bag!”
“I did think Ayuri had a big load with her today… so this is the costume stuff, then.”

It really was a big bag for Ayu, the contents even poking out a little. It was all bundled up in a plastic bag, though, so I couldn’t make out what was actually inside. So what had all that panicking earlier been about, then…? Well, it would all come clear once Hina’s big reveal was over, so I let it drop for now.

◆◆◆

“Ta-daa~! This year I’m a zombie~!”
“Oooh~”

A dozen-odd minutes later, Hina came back changed, and her getup was seriously committed. She must have gotten hold of some old clothes; knowing her, she’d deliberately tattered the outfit and worked grime into it besides. The real deal. Over a base of white face paint she’d stuck on wound stickers and used fake blood to make it look like it was trickling from her mouth, and plenty more on top of that… clearly a whole different level of commitment than Sumire or me.

“Ooh! Amazing, that’s amazing, Hina!”
“It really is…”
“It’s like the ones you see in street interviews or on social media! Amazing, amazing!!”
“Ehehe~, this makes me happy~”

‘Amazing, amazing!’ Ayu kept it up, getting more and more hyped, circling Hina without a care in the world to admire the handiwork from every angle. Hina, for her part, looked genuinely delighted at all the praise.

“This means Ayuri can’t afford to lose either…!”
“…Ah.”
“Right… I mean, she went and prepped a prop this huge, so after building expectations up this much, if it turns out lame, she’d be embarrassing Hina.”
“I can’t wait~”

“…”

At this point all that was left was the grand finale: Ayu’s turn. There was no way she’d top Hina’s craftsmanship, honestly… but Ayu has a way of getting weirdly meticulous in the oddest places, so our expectations climbed a fair bit regardless.

“…Umm, so first, about what’s in this big bag… it’s… this, see.”

As if she couldn’t stand all the eyes on her, Ayu rummaged around and drew the contents out of the sack poking from her bag… huh? What is that?

“…What’s this, a snake staff?”
“It’s a cobra~”

What Ayu had produced… was a snake staff, its handle molded into the shape of a cobra.

As our expectant looks curdled into dubious ones, Ayu started talking of her own accord, like she was making a confession.

“So I figured, since I was at it, I’d set a budget and go all the way to the shopping mall to hunt for stuff I could use for a Halloween costume.”
“And that’s what you bought…? How much did it run you?”
“1,700 yen, pre-tax.”
“Pricey!”
“B-but look! This little Cobby here spits steam, see!? Look!!”

Ayu pressed a switch, the cobra’s mouth cracked open, and the water she’d apparently loaded inside ahead of time sprayed out in a fine mist… …did this feature need to exist?

“That feels nice~”
“It’s a toy.”
“It’s a toy, but isn’t it kinda great!?”
“By the way, what was the budget?”
“3,000 yen.”
“You spent more than half of it.”
“After that I spent it on lunch and snacks and stuff, so I ended up with like 30 yen left.”
“Want me to snatch those snacks off you, nice and Halloween-style?”
“Too bad! They’re already in everyone’s stomachs!”

“…”

— Irk.

“Ow! No to violence!”
“Gin, that’s a no-no~!”

I mean… come on. Right?

Here Hina had poured this much effort into her costume… and Ayu had bought nothing but a toy she’d be sick of within the week, one destined to gather dust in a closet, and then had the nerve to act all shameless about it… right?

“Come on… apologize to Hina. She went and put this much effort in, looking forward to your costume and all.”
“Eh!? Just me!? Sumire’s a first-timer so fine, but Gin, you do this every year too!?”
“I’m like this every year, so… but well, I’ll apologize too, I guess.”
“…Hina. I’m really sorry, okay?”
“Sorry, Hina.”
“…Hehe.”
“…Hina?”

Hina would surely just laugh and forgive us… but we genuinely did feel bad, and feeling bad, it was better to say sorry. Only… how do I put it, she was laughing, yes, but not quite the laugh I’d expected. More like she’d been ‘waiting for exactly this.’ The pleased little laugh of someone whose scheme has just come together.

“Honestly~, I kinda saw this coming~”
“R-really?”
“But even though I saw it coming… it’s still sad when it actually happens~… boo-hoo~…”

…Somehow, I had the feeling I’d heard this exact sort of buildup not long ago… or maybe talked it through myself…

“I’m sorry, Hina.”
“I’m so sad~, and here I was, looking forward to what costume you’d do, Ayu~… makes me feel like a silly fool for getting all excited~…”
“Th-that much!? Forgive me, Hina!”
“…Well theen~… I do happen to have a backup plan ready, just in case your prep didn’t work out, Ayu~…”
“…Hm?”

Ah, Ayu seemed to have caught on as well… but it was surely too late now, even if she’d only just twigged that this had been Hina’s real aim all along.

“Come on, this way~”
“Eh, Hina? …Wh-whoa, so strong!?”
“Give it up, Ayu. When you get down to it, it’s your fault for buying nothing but a weird toy.”
“Hang in there, Ayuri.”
“Eh, what!? What’s going to happen to me!?”
“It’s okay~, we’re just gonna have you wear a costume you’d never pick for yourself~”

And so Ayu was hauled off by the zombie-clad Hina… Come to think of it, Halloween costumes are supposedly about disguising oneself as an evil spirit to slip in among them unnoticed. Or so the story goes.

◆◆◆

“Sorry to keep you waiting~! …Come on, Ayu, hurry, hurry.”
“Ehh… do I really have to come out in this?”
“C’mon! Hurry up and show us!”
“Yeah, yeah!”
“See, even the black cat and the witch are heckling you~?”
“What vulgar excuses for a black cat and a witch…”

Ayu was dragged and shoved bodily out into the living room by Hina. And her getup was…

“Ta-daa~! I’m the bandage girl~!”
“Oho…”
“…Hmm.”
“Say a little more than that!”

Ayu had come out red-faced and mortified, and her costume was… her whole body wound round and round in faintly grubby bandages. Not a bandage man, but a bandage girl. For whatever reason, though, she seemed genuinely embarrassed, hugging her arms around herself as if to hide, curling in on herself.

“…See, I told you this is kinda lewd! Bits of skin keep peeking out and it’s a little indecent!”
“Ehh~, no it’s not~. You’ve got clothes on underneath and everything, so it’s fine, riiight~?”
“It would’ve been nice if you’d wrapped it so the underneath actually showed, though!”

…She had a point there, actually. She did have something on under there, apparently, but she was wrapped so snugly, right down to her hands and feet with bits of skin showing through here and there, that from where we sat we couldn’t entirely rule out she was naked underneath. Schrödinger’s cat logic, basically.

“But last year you were saying ‘the shoulder-baring is a bit much~,’ weren’t you, Ayu? This way there’s less exposure, too~”
“There is less! There is less!!”
“Alright then, now that everyone’s costumes are ready, let’s kick off the photo session~, yeah~!”
“Yeah~!”
“Eh!? Am I really getting my photos taken in this this year!?”

And so this year’s costume photo session turned into a rowdy affair.

…Incidentally, whether she made her peace with it partway through or simply got used to it I couldn’t say, but by the end Ayu was posing for the camera with total confidence, striking poses and all.