I Am God (Saintess’s Point Of View) (4)

“Did you remember anything?”

“Not at all.”

“I see… I hope you can remember someday.”

“Indeed.”

A lack of memories.

Not knowing who you are is a lonely thing.

Because we were connected by our souls, I could understand Kojiro’s loneliness and sense of isolation.

“I hope you find it soon as well, Soji-dono.”

“Hm? I’m not suffering from amnesia.”

“That is not what I meant. Your wish, Soji-dono… to meet someone you can truly believe in with all your heart.”

“—!”

I stopped swinging my sword.

“…What is that supposed to mean?”

“Just as Soji-dono understands my feelings, I can also understand yours.”

“……”

“A painful past, is it not?”

Silence enveloped us.

Honestly, it was infuriating.

Even my past was being peered into—privacy meant nothing at all.

“Hurry up and get your memories back already! It’s unfair that only I get looked at!”

“I wish that were possible, but without a trigger…”

“Damn it… ah, I lost count already.”

“That was your seventy-fifth swing.”

“—!”

I turned toward the voice that told me the count.

Standing behind me was Erika.

“Erika.”

“You were making all that huffing and puffing noise, so I woke up.”

“Uh, sorry.”

“I’m joking. I just woke up normally.”

Erika walked over and stopped beside me.

“Practicing swings in the middle of the night—trying to show how serious you are?”

“To whom? I’m just doing it because I’m bored.”

“Oh? Still, that’s a good attitude. You need to get stronger—for my sake, too.”

“Yeah, yeah.”

I resumed my practice swings.

Erika sat down neatly beside me as I swung.

“Thanks for earlier.”

“For what?”

“For Semirena. You persuaded her well.”

“It just looked uncomfortable to watch.”

“I’m sorry about that. But really, you saved me. If she’d kept treating me like a god, I would’ve suffocated.”

“That’s rough—having to pretend to be not just a Hero, but a god too.”

Erika chuckled softly.

She really did have a nasty personality.

“You’re enjoying this, aren’t you?”

“I helped you, didn’t I? You should be grateful.”

“I already thanked you. If anything, you should worship me as a god for saving you from that nightmare.”

“Absolutely not.”

Yeah, figures.

Erika worshiping me—there was no way that would ever happen.

I couldn’t even imagine it.

“I am grateful, though.”

“Huh?”

“For saving me. It really was a nightmare.”

“……”

“What?”

“No, it’s just rare for you to thank someone so honestly. Do you have a fever?”

“I’ll hit you.”

“Please spare me the violence.”

I finished my hundredth practice swing.

Time for a break.

I sat down next to Erika.

“Everyone’s amazing, you know. They’ve got their own problems, and yet they join the Hero’s party and risk their lives for others.”

“True. They’re nothing like us.”

“Wait—us too?”

“I set out on this journey for my own sake. Defeating the Demon King is just part of the process of meeting my destined partner.”

Her goal was to meet her destined partner.

Defeating the Demon King would normally mean marrying the Hero, but she intended to avoid that by exploiting the fact that I was a fake.

For her, this journey was also about searching for a future spouse.

“That’s something the citizens would be speechless to hear.”

“They can think whatever they want. As royalty, it’s natural to sacrifice oneself for the people—but that doesn’t mean I shouldn’t seek my own happiness.”

“That’s true. You have to value yourself.”

“You understand surprisingly well.”

“We’re kind of similar.”

I had also chosen to pretend to be a Hero just to survive.

I was in no position to be proud before the people who believed in me.

I was a fake, after all.

“Maybe we really are alike.”

“Don’t lump me together with a fake liar, will you?”

“Hey, at least meet me halfway.”

“Hehe, no. The only one I’ll ever align my heart with is my destined partner.”

“I see.”

Still as uncooperative as ever.

Yet I’d grown used to this relationship enough to find that very trait fitting for Erika.

“I hope you find them. Your destined partner.”

“You’re going to help too.”

“Why me…?”

“Obviously. You’re in no position to refuse.”

That was true.

Since she had leverage over me, I couldn’t disobey her orders.

It was like having a leash around my neck.

“If we defeat the Demon King and your secret comes out, I might still be forced into marriage if I don’t have someone lined up. So finding a partner is essential.”

“Forced… like, against your will?”

“That’s how it works. For royalty… freedom doesn’t exist.”

Erika stood up.

“Once you’re born into royalty, you can’t escape being bound by duty and status. Then at the very least, I want to choose the person I spend my life with.”

“……”

I felt like I could hear a painful cry in her words.

She must have hardships that we ordinary people could never understand.

“I’ll do anything to find my destined partner. You’ll cooperate.”

“I’ll help as much as I can.”

“I won’t let you run away, you know?”

“I won’t. But what if you find your destined partner halfway through?”

“In that case… I’ll leave the Demon King to you.”

Wow… that was cruel.

The people and the king would cry if they heard that.

“I’m joking.”

“Let’s pray you don’t find them until the very end.”

“Don’t pray on your own, will you? I’ll hit you.”

“I don’t think resorting to violence so easily is a good thing!”

“You’re special.”

“That’s not a kind of special!”

Even so, talking with Erika—the only one in this world who knew my true identity—felt strangely relaxing.

I didn’t have to be careful with my words.

Amid this suffocating journey, the time spent alone with her felt special in its own way.

Surely, for her as well…