Initiation (1)

The two returned to the parish consultation room, signed the final initiation papers, and completed the simplified procedures for entry.

The village priest smiled as he bid farewell to Lyset.

“Now I truly won’t see you again, Lyset. It’s been a joy. If you follow the path of a Holy Sister with prayer and service, one day we’ll meet again in Heaven. Farewell.”

“Thank you, Father.”

Lyset smiled brightly and bowed her head.

The village priest handed Lyset her luggage, exchanged farewells with Joachim, and went outside.

“Now, let’s go meet the Mother Superior of the convent.”

As they crossed into the nuns’ quarters, the atmosphere changed dramatically.

A silence unlike anywhere else, a sense of restraint, bore down on Lyset. Even nuns chatting in small groups covered their mouths and whispered so faintly no outsider could hear.

The nuns who recognized Joachim crossed themselves and exchanged greetings.

When Joachim pointed to Lyset and explained why they had come, a door to the convent’s interior quietly opened.

“From here on, this will truly be your living space, so take a good look.”

“Yes!”

The walls were filled with icons and holy paintings, while rows of small rooms lined the halls, each with sisters praying or reading Scripture.

What caught Lyset’s eye was a room larger than the rest. From the grated opening above its door came the sound of lashes and groans.

Lyset stopped walking, and Joachim halted with her.

“Curious?”

“Yes…”

“That is the punishment room. For things a Holy Sister must not do—from repeated tardiness to Mass or lessons, to disturbing another’s devotion, or harboring impure thoughts. It is meant to make them come to their senses and renew their vows of faith.”

“I want to see.”

Joachim was startled, then frowned. Lyset was only twelve, and he worried about showing such punishments to a novice just entering.

“Let’s just pass by for now. There’s nothing good for you to see yet.”

Smack! Smack!

“Argh! Ugh!”

The strangled cries burst out; even passing nuns quickened their pace, eager to leave the place behind.

“I want to see!”

At Lyset’s insistent demand, Joachim grew flustered.

“Must you really?”

“Yes. Please.”

“Fine. We can’t go in, but I’ll lift you up so you can look.”

Joachim sighed and lifted Lyset.

Inside was indeed a scene Joachim had feared to show.

A nun stood bound by her wrists to ropes from the ceiling, her upper body bare, her pale skin covered in red welts.

A middle-aged sister struck her chest with a water-soaked leather strap.

Crack!

“Your lust resides in this flesh! To dare touch yourself in your sleep—what were you thinking in this holy place?!”

Crack!

The young nun wept and screamed, unable even to beg. The trembling of her chest was wrapped in the strap that cut scars like blades into her flesh.

“Enough. Stop looking now.”

Joachim lowered Lyset, deeming it more than enough.

Lyset stared at him, her expression saying she had something to say. Joachim gave a wry smile.

“Well then, Lyset. What did you feel?”

“Pity.”

“Yes… it is heartbreaking. Many of the demands here may seem absurd to outsiders. But suppressing desire, living only in prayer, meditation, and devotion—that is the path of a Holy Sister. Break it, and punishment follows.”

“Why? Why must they suppress desire and live only in prayer, meditation, and devotion?”

“Because it is the virtue of a Holy Sister.”

“Who decided that? Is it written in Scripture?”

“Ah…”

Joachim was at a loss, but as a priest he was used to handling such questions with practiced wisdom.

“It is an attitude of faith set by the devout since ancient times—shutting oneself from the world, living in purity of body and mind, looking only to the Lord.”

“Then why were they born?”

“What?”

“If that’s their life, why did the Lord let them be born at all? He could have just kept them as angels in Heaven.”

“Lyset, what are you…”

“Wouldn’t it be better to run, raise chickens, plant potatoes… sing and dance too? Then wouldn’t faith and prayer be more joyful?”

“Well, yes.”

“Never leaving this place, only reading prayers and Scripture all life… Is that really what the Lord desires?”

“Mm…”

Joachim sighed with a weary breath.

He too still searched for the answer. In his mind flashed his status, and what he had done with Kraf, with Christine.

It was surely sin, an unspeakable profanity—yet none had punished him.

That fragile nun had merely touched herself in sleep and was beaten mercilessly—while he, admired by all, enjoyed high office and exploited nuns.

“Father Joachim!”

Lyset’s voice, firm and strong, startled Joachim.

“Yes, what is it?”

“I don’t believe God created humans to lock them up and punish them.”

“……”

“Wouldn’t He rather see them enjoy the world He gave, live, struggle, praise Him with song and dance?”

Joachim wondered if this girl was truly twelve—could such words come from a child?—and he was seized by fear.

“Ly-Lyset… to say such things here…”

“The most terrifying thing is not disbelief—but forgetting God, killing His faithful, and destroying all tied to Him.”

“…!!!”

“Of course, I mean the Lord.”

A chill ran up Joachim’s back and spread through his body.

“Lyset… you, you…”

Just then,

“Oh my, Father Joachim! What brings you here?”

A middle-aged nun, flanked by half a dozen others, approached—dignified yet cold in bearing.

“Ah, peace in the Lord… Mother Cecilia.”

“Peace in the Lord. I see you’ve come to introduce us to a new member of our family.”

“Yes. This girl is Lyset from Songdal Village north of Mount Yotun. She was marked for initiation four years ago, and now she has come.”

The convent’s prioress bent slightly to meet Lyset’s gaze.

“Peace in the Lord. Hello, Lyset. I am Cecilia, head of this Nastrand convent. You may call me Mother Superior, or simply Mother.”

“Hello, Mother.”

Lyset greeted her with a bright smile.

Among the nuns behind her, Christine met Joachim’s eyes, blushed, and lowered her head.

He recalled embracing her in the storeroom earlier, and his body stirred again.

Christine, too, felt it; her eyes turned hazy with longing as she looked at Joachim.

“Ahem, hm!”

Joachim quickly bowed and patted Lyset’s head.

“She is a very bright girl. She will surely grow in faith and become a shining light of this convent.”

“Yes. Her eyes sparkle with spirit. The initiation procedure…?”

“She has already had an audience and given greetings to High Priest Kraf. All administrative matters are finished.”

“Then we can take over from here. Joanna?”

The prioress called the name of one nun in the back. A young woman with freckles and curly red hair stepped forward.

“See that Lyset receives her new clothes and a room. After tonight’s Mass, I’ll share tea with her and speak together. Remember this, Lyset. Welcome.”

The prioress and her group gave a brief bow, left Joanna behind, and passed Joachim and Lyset. Christine winked at Joachim as she went.

With nothing more to do, Joachim hesitated, then gave the farewell “Peace in the Lord…” and told Lyset they’d meet again before heading outside.

“Alright, Lyset! My name is Joanna. You may call me Sister Joanna. Come with me—there’s a room perfect for your age. Four share it, and one bed is open.”

Joanna picked up Lyset’s bundle and bag, leading the way. Lyset followed, glancing around curiously.

Down the dimmest corridor at the farthest end, Lyset heard Scripture recitations and confessions leaking from behind sealed doors. In that dark, stifling place, the sounds gave off not sanctity but something eerie.

‘Stifling… too stifling. Everything is being crushed down.’

Then Joanna, walking ahead, stopped.

“This will be your room from now on.”

As Joanna opened the door, two nuns on a bed sprang apart. She glared at them sternly. Barely out of girlhood, the pair stood awkwardly, heads flushed red and bowed low.

“What exactly were you doing at this hour, Sisters Adelin and Iselin?”

“W-we were just talking a little.”

“Don’t lie, Adelin!”

Joanna sighed deeply and pointed at their loosened garments.

“I-it was hot, that’s all…”

“Iselin, will you also add the sin of lying like Adelin?”

Joanna crossed her arms and exhaled sharply.

“We-we’re sorry, Sister Joanna…”

The two shook in terror, pale, afraid they might be dragged straight to the punishment room.

“I’ve brought a young girl who will start her convent life in this room—what kind of filth and blasphemy is this?”

“……”

They kept their heads low but sneaked a glance at Lyset standing by Joanna. Lyset smiled at them brightly as if to say she minded nothing.

“We won’t ever again—”

“Indeed. I’d rather not mention the punishment room in front of this child. I know well enough how loneliness breeds temptation. But since you’ll share this room with her, you must act with restraint and show her a good example.”

“We won’t ever do it again. Please believe us!”

“This is the second time I’ve caught you. Next time, I will truly report it to the discipline council. For now, write fifty copies of the penitential prayer from Scripture and submit them by morning.”

It was still a measure of leniency, and the two nuns’ faces brightened with relief.

To lighten the harsh mood, Joanna smiled faintly as she looked around the room.

“How is it, Lyset? This is your room. Soon you’ll receive your nun’s habit, with the Nordelweiss emblem embroidered in front, marking you as a novice. You’ll wear it during your three-year apprenticeship. Other supplies will arrive before supper.”

Lyset’s eyes went to the bunk beds on each side of the room—plain, undecorated. Aside from them, there was only a worn wardrobe and two desks.

The tightly closed windows, thick curtains, and burning candles erased any trace that it was bright afternoon outside.

“Sister Roze?”

“She went to do laundry. She’ll return soon.”

“Good. Show her to the empty bed—and since she’s young, switch her to a lower one if possible. Also, explain the rules to her.”

“Yes, understood.”

“Now then, Lyset, let’s unpack. We’ll separate what you can use here from what you can’t. Most things will likely be discarded, since everything is provided here. This inspection marks your true first step in being separated from the world.”

Without waiting for Lyset’s reply, Joanna snatched her belongings and began tearing them open.

A cold chill began to settle in Lyset’s eyes.