At The End Of The Hand I Grasped (2)

—Clatter-clatter!
Startled by the loud noise, Noi spun around in a panic.

Kardia had tripped again. He had hit the wall, knocking a framed painting down—and the frame had stuck into his head.

“K-Kardia!?”

Noi rushed over and quickly pulled the painting out from where it had lodged against Kardia’s head.

Aware of how red his face was, Kardia covered it with both forearms. He absolutely did not want Noi to see him like this.

(It’s a lie, no—it’s different. The only one that matters to me is my master…)

When he learned that Noi was Noi Galenée, Kardia had been happy from the bottom of his heart.

Because it had felt like a pardon he could give himself: that he had been drawn to her because she was his master.

But in truth, he had known.

The days he spent with Noi had overflowed with colors wholly different from any warmth merely given by a master.

(The fingers that touched mine…)

Don’t let go. He hadn’t wanted to say it himself, yet he had absolutely not wanted her to let go, so he had remained utterly still in that moment.

(“Not love,” I cut it off as that.)

But something like that—could never exist between master and disciple.

(…Then what was it…?)

With his face blazing red and his brows pinched tight, Kardia watched as Noi crouched in front of him, looking a little troubled yet composed—as if she meant to wait there.

That composure stung again; this feeling didn’t fit anywhere inside the “liking” Kardia knew, and his brow furrowed deeper.

“Excuse me, is something the matter?”

Someone addressed them—Kardia and Noi, sitting at the edge of the corridor. It was Lepto, who had come as a Royal Court Mage.

“Ah, sorry. Don’t mind us.”

Noi stood in place of the crouching Kardia and smiled at Lepto.

“Even so…”

“It’s fine. I was just about to escort him to his room.”

“Then allow me to help. An extra pair of strong arms would be best, I think.”

At the instant Lepto said that, Kardia was already on his feet. He absolutely did not want to rely on this man’s hands. And he didn’t want to show any more pathetic sides of himself in front of Noi.

“Thank you, but we’re all right.”

“I see… then please do take care.”

Lepto answered modestly. Kardia smiled pleasantly, but inwardly he was irritated. This man always seemed to parade his good manners before Noi, and it grated on him.

As Kardia turned to go, Lepto called out to stop Noi behind his back.

“Ah—Noi-sama.”

“Hm? What is it?”

“I heard a rumor that you wished to go to the royal capital.”

Kardia’s steps stopped cold.

(…She talked about that with someone other than me?)

It felt like thousands of needles stabbed his heart at once.

Seeing Kardia’s stricken expression, Noi hurried to offer Lepto an explanation.

“I merely asked the representative if there might be work I could do even in the capital.”

“I understand. In that case, please do come to my house.”

Kardia arched one eyebrow. He wanted to snort—what was this upstart he had only met recently even saying?

(Besides, that matter was settled yesterday.)

Noi had promised not to leave here. Kardia had won the wager.

She would refuse at once—so he thought. And yet—

“I see… thank you. Let me think about it.”

(…What?)

Hearing words he could not believe, Kardia stared at Noi’s small body.

“Of course.”

“In any case, I imagine I’ll be calling on you before long.”

“My whole family will be waiting to receive you.”

With that, Lepto bowed his head and headed toward the dining hall.

Noi turned back to Kardia, who had been staring after that scene in a daze. Looking up at him with a face as if nothing had happened, she made Kardia’s anger rise.

“…So he’s next, is that it?”

“Eh?”

“Because I can’t offer the kind of love you want, you’ll go to him?”

Even if Kardia did not become her lover, Noi could make someone else her lover.

Would she seek love from that man as well? Wear a special smile, call him with a special gentleness—

(And share a special time like last night—with someone other than me?)

His vision nearly swam with rage. He had never been this angry at Noi—or at anyone.

Noi, who had been gaping, narrowed her eyes upward.

“Don’t talk as if I’m some flirt.”

“You said you’d think about it. Why didn’t you refuse on the spot? Say something like that, and a man will get his hopes up.”

As Kardia bared his teeth in anger, Noi sighed.

“A woman, too, would get her hopes up if you said it like that.”

“Excuse me?”

“—I wasn’t going to rush things!”

Startled by Noi’s shout, Kardia shut his mouth.

Realizing he had gone quiet, Noi exhaled a long breath. Then, perhaps to steady herself, after a brief silence she spoke slowly.

“—If our paths diverge, someday that future might come.”

He didn’t want to understand what she meant. Every pore on his body bristled in rejection.

His guts boiled; his vision flickered. If it weren’t Noi standing there, he would have blasted the speaker away with magic by now. That was how infuriating—and how sad—it was.

Clenching his fists, he somehow calmed his emotions.

Mustering every scrap of reason and courage he possessed, Kardia murmured, barely above a whisper.

“…—I don’t want that.”

He knew it was something he shouldn’t say.

Kardia would take nothing from Noi—neither her freedom nor her future.

And yet, the raw feeling bared there was terribly guileless.

Showing the true heart he usually hid behind smiles and a flood of words took a great deal of courage.

Even so, that was Kardia’s most heartfelt wish.

Noi drew a sharp breath. Then she stepped toward Kardia.

One step, two. Cowed by her approach, Kardia backed away—only for his back to hit the corridor wall at once. Noi cornered him and, as if to pen him in, wrapped him in her arms.

It was a small child’s body. She couldn’t even use mana. If he wanted to push her off, it would have been easy.

But of course he could never do such a thing.

Face burning and heart trembling painfully, all Kardia could do at the shock of Noi’s sudden embrace was open and close his mouth soundlessly.

From within Kardia’s chest, Noi tipped up her face, saw how red he was, and grinned. Tears glimmered at the corners of her eyes.

“For now, I’ll be satisfied with this.”

‘I am your master, after all’, she said with a lofty sigh.

“When men get on in years, they don’t change how they live. Past fifty, they won’t even listen to their wives. You’re twice that! There are limits to how curmudgeonly an old man can be.”

“…C-curmudgeonly old man.”

“Even so, I’m generous. Especially—when it comes to you, Kardia.”

“Yes.”

“Carry me.”

Already clinging to him, Noi made the imperious demand.

After a brief, wordless hesitation, Kardia slid an arm under her knees and lifted her in one arm.

“Take me to the garden. I’ve given up on breakfast.”

“…You have, Noi?”

“Who do you think made me do that?”

Noi pinched Kardia’s nose with a firm squeeze. That unabashed gesture let his heart—racing until now—finally exhale. A smile came to Kardia’s lips on its own.

Still holding Noi in his arms, Kardia started walking.

Then he opened the window, stepped out onto the balcony, and vaulted the railing—still carrying Noi—down into the garden.