Door Of My Heart, My Foot

The feast for the household staff was held, and held lavishly.

The gathering was not confined to the staff who had found the extra Dural fields and done such great service in making the fertilizer. Every last one of the household who had stayed on at Grace Castle to the very end, for all that their meager wages had come as seldom as rain in a drought, was there too.

Dong-hui had given the head cook particular orders not to spare the food, and all through the supper the sound of boisterous laughter never once left the table.

Her ladyship had turned into a different person overnight, and they were bewildered by it, at a loss to say what on earth had happened. Underneath the bewilderment, though, a hope that had never once shown its face until now was stirring and squirming its way to life.

The hope that they too might yet live well; the expectation that from here things would only go on getting better; and the relief of knowing that they need not go hungry any longer.

They had stayed to the last by leaning on one another, and that made today’s feast mean all the more.

“Are they all together, eating?”

Dong-hui put the question casually, looking at Delma, who had finished her own meal early and come back. It was no more than a single meal, but no matter how many times she heard it, it always felt good to know that someone had taken pleasure in a kindness of hers.

“Yes. They are all in high spirits.”

Delma winked as though she had a troublemaking son in mind, though the corners of her own mouth had gone up and showed no sign of coming down again.

“That is good to hear. Tell them to send out plenty, so there is no running short.”
“Yes, my lady.”
“Did Delma have a drink too?”
“Yes. I was in such good spirits I had five.”

Delma put on a triumphant face and spread all five fingers out wide.

“What sort of drink?”
“Ale, of course. It had not been brewing long, so the taste was the poorer for it, but it went down well enough all the same.”
“Ale?”

She had never been much of a drinker to begin with. Wine, at least, she roughly knew the taste of; ale she had never once heard of in her life. She wondered whether it was something like beer.

“Yes. The head cook made it the moment the grain ration came in, and my, how he boasted about it.”
“I am curious what it tastes like.”

She remembered the days after her convenience-store shift, worn out past bearing, when she would steel herself against the expense and knock back a can of beer. Her body would be a dead weight; then the ice-cold beer would go glugging down her throat, her head would clear right to the crown of it, and a low “Ahhh” would come out of her all on its own. There was never anything to eat with it but a single bag of snacks, and still that time was the one reward she ever gave herself.

Her mouth watered at the old memory, and when she swallowed hard, Delma narrowed her eyes and shook her head from side to side, as much as to say she should not so much as dream of it.

“My lady is not yet of age, so my lady must not drink. You do know that?”
“I shall be of age soon enough.”
“Soon, indeed! Absolutely not.”
“Tch!”
“Instead, on the day of the birthday party when my lady comes of age, I shall have a very fine wine ready.”
“Good. Mind you keep that promise.”

Dong-hui and Delma were trading mild little jokes when a noise came from outside.

“Chloe! Chloe!”

A familiar voice, and an unwelcome one, was shouting Chloe over and over from just outside the study. Dong-hui frowned and got to her feet.

“What is that noise?”
“It sounds like Master Ray’s voice?”
“Ray? That lowlife?”

Once, Chloe had been pouring out an aching confession of love, swearing she could die in his place; now here she was calling him a lowlife without turning a hair. Watching it, Delma felt a small doubt as to whether she had meant any of it. Her lady had grown up, certainly, but Delma did not believe a person’s heart could turn right over in a single night.

Delma said nothing, only stood there blinking her wide eyes, and Dong-hui turned to Handsome at her side and called him.

“Butler.”
“Yes, my lady.”
“How is that man inside my castle? Who let him in?”

She had never given leave for Ray to come and go in the castle again.

Every trace of laughter had gone out of the lord’s voice, and Handsome’s face and Delma’s stiffened in the same instant. Their eyes met for a fraction of a second, and Delma put a hand to her breast, relieved that this was not a question she had to answer. Handsome, for his part, could not keep still, and bowed his head.

“My apologies. I shall go out and look into it at once.”

He said it hurriedly, bending at the waist.

Red Bear, the knight commander, could not possibly have let Ray in; he had seen clearly enough last time how Dong-hui handled the man. Which left the gatekeepers at the castle gate, and Dong-hui grew certain that one of them was in Ray’s pocket.

“There will be some who have taken a few coins off Ray. Find every one of them and dismiss them.”
“Yes! Understood.”

She dealt kindly enough with the servants, but any of them who would sooner follow an outsider for a few coins pressed into the hand than follow her was no use to her.

Let them go off after Ray, then.

Delma’s eyes followed Handsome’s back as he answered smartly and went out, then came back to the lord.

“And what shall we do about Master Ray?”
“Chloe! I’m out here! Chloe, my love! I told you I’ve come!”

Ray’s voice came in through the door as aching as ever. He was not getting into the study, though; the racket stayed outside it, which meant the knights on guard were doing their job well enough.

“Tell him to come in.”
“I beg your pardon? My lady will not have him driven out?”

Delma, who had been quietly preparing to throw Ray out, went round-eyed at the unexpected order. Her first worry was that her ladyship’s heart might have gone soft again.

The voice outside was on the edge of tears now, and the name Chloe came out so slurred that he must have been thoroughly drunk.

“Mm. So I can watch what he has to say for himself. I was bored anyway, so this suits me nicely. Tell him to come in. Ah — and the knights standing guard outside along with him. If it comes to it they can throw him straight back out.”

She said it with a wink thrown in for good measure, and Delma, reassured at last, went out beaming. Her step, as she trotted out through the door, could not have been lighter.

A little while later Ray came staggering into the study, thoroughly disheveled. The smell of drink thickened the nearer he came, and Dong-hui screwed up her face and fanned a hand back and forth in front of it.

“Chloe. I knew you’d call for me.”

He came toward her with tears actually brimming and hanging in his eyes, and the sight of him was very nearly pitiful. Going by the outside alone, he had a face that put a spell on people, enough to make anyone want to pat his back and soothe him on the spot. He was a flower boy among flower boys to begin with, and now, with those clear tears standing full in his eyes, a lily in full bloom had nothing on him.

But Dong-hui had long since worked out exactly what sort of human being Ray was, and his sculpted looks stirred nothing in her whatsoever. If anything, watching him strain to do something with that handsome face made her want to look away.

“Get your words straight. I did not call for you; you came calling. And gracious creature that I am, I opened the door.”

Dong-hui said it irritably, stepping back out of the smell of drink.

“Exactly. You opened the door of your heart again. To me.”

Ray blew the thing up out of all proportion, just as he pleased, and took a step closer.

“Door of my heart, my foot.”
“Chloe! Why on earth has my angel of a Chloe changed like this? Who on earth has made our Chloe change like this? Who is it? Bring him here this instant!”

Ray bellowed and bellowed as though Chloe had taken up with another man. Dong-hui made to answer, then shut her mouth instead, curious how long he could go on babbling such nonsense.

Chloe said nothing and only gazed steadily at him, and Ray began to believe that his own words were the truth.

“Chloe, how can you do this to me? You said I was everything to you. Have you got another man already? Did the swine tell you to throw me over and look at nobody but him? What kind of scum is he?”

For some reason she could not have named, the status window came suddenly into Dong-hui’s mind.

“There is. A being far more capable than you, and one that shines all on its own.”
“What? Better-looking than me?”

Ray’s eyes flew open; he stopped swaying and drew himself bolt upright. What stung him seemed to be less the existence of another man than being told the man was the better of the two. Dong-hui gave a soft, needling smile and answered.

“Of course. The likes of you are not even in the comparison. And it is forever fretting over what more it can give me. Nothing at all like you, always working out what you can take off me.”

Ray shut his mouth, startled perhaps, and studied Chloe closely, his eyes wide.

“That’s a lie.”

He had been looking at Chloe a long while; now he worked an easy smile onto his mouth and tossed the words out.

“What?”
“It’s a lie. You’re only carrying on like this because you’re angry that I keep bringing Erma along.”

Now she knew, plain as day, what people meant by talking to a wall. Watching him quietly, she grew certain that whatever she said, he would take it exactly as he wished to take it.

“Let me say it again: whether you bring Erma along or bring Perm along, it makes not the slightest difference to me.”

Firm as Dong-hui’s answer was, Ray only let out a deep sigh and shook his head from side to side.

“I know how much you loved me. But understand this one thing at least. I love you so much too. So let’s stop this pointless squabbling. I’ve had a proper word with Erma too. She won’t be setting foot inside Grace Castle again. So come on, Chloe — stop tormenting me and come here into my arms.”

Ray spread both arms wide and put on an expression fairly dripping with innocent purity.

Dong-hui was so dumbfounded that a hollow laugh came out of her all by itself. Ray took that smile for permission and, overcome, walked toward Chloe with both arms still spread.

Arms folded, she watched him come on as though she could hardly believe it, and the moment he was within arm’s reach she took hold of one of his fingers and gripped it tight.

“Chloe. Why only my finger? Are you shy?”

Ray lifted his cheekbones as though he found her adorable and gave an oily smile. Dong-hui felt as though she had put ten blocks of butter into her mouth at once and rubbed them into her gums.

Unable to stand Ray’s slithering a moment longer, she wrenched the index finger she was holding downward, hard.

“Aaaaaaagh!”

Ray, his finger bent back without warning, hopped about trying to pull his hurt hand free. Dong-hui made as if to bend a finger on the other hand too, then simply shook out her palm instead.

“You! You! Why, you—!”

Furious, his face gone red, Ray was on the very point of lunging at Chloe.

— Whump!

With that dull, blunt sound Ray went down, sprawling limp on the floor like a leaf in late autumn.

“Don’t you dare lay a hand on her!”

Delma had shouldered Ray away with all her strength, and she shouted it with her face scarlet, breathing hard.