Chapter 40

“You don’t have to give me a lap pillow from now on… but could you hold me while we sleep? I think that would solve my insomnia, too.”

I wasn’t quite sure if I understood what she was saying. No, the request was incredibly simple so I did understand it, but I had a feeling it was problematic in several ways. Yes, very problematic.

“I’m not sure I follow what you mean.”

“Liar! I didn’t say anything complicated enough for you not to get it.”

Pulling her face away just slightly, Mary stared at me reproachfully. She looked like a pouting little sister, which was significantly cute. Since she was already quite pretty to begin with, gestures like that were a real problem for me.

“You can at least manage to hug someone while you sleep, right? I don’t think it would disturb your rest. Besides, I’ll be able to sleep soundly, so it’s a win-win relationship, right?”

I thought to myself that since I’d just be sleeping normally, it wasn’t exactly a “win” for me—but then again, being able to sleep while hugging a beautiful girl is a win… However, I doubted Mary was implying that side of things.

“Um, let me be frank. I’m a man of a certain age. Hugging a girl while sleeping… well, I might get, you know, ‘restless’ in a carnal sense. If you were my actual sister, I wouldn’t do anything, but if I were to turn into a ‘wolf’ at some point, it would be a disaster…”

If she were extremely young, I think I’d be fine as long as I didn’t have those specific tastes, but Mary’s appearance was well within the “strike zone” for an average man. In terms of age, she looked about fourteen or fifteen.

For example, you see young men who are strangely desperate to date female students at the magic school; that’s precisely because they perceive girls of that age as romantic interests.

So, for me, it would be like a slow torture of self-restraint. And if I were to lay a hand on her and Mary got angry, not only would I be killed, but the entire Capital might be destroyed. No matter how you looked at it, that was an unacceptable risk. At the very least, I had to prune that risk away.

I like to think I’m a rational human being who has lived his life without hurting others.
But… well, there might be days when I’m drunk… or even if I manage to restrain myself, I might be too worked up to sleep. If I constantly failed to get rest, it would be bad for my health and interfere with my work.

“You really do say the exact same kinds of things as my big brother…”

Moving away from me, Mary sat on the edge of the bed and swung her legs back and forth.

“I should have known that I shouldn’t just say whatever I’m thinking so honestly… I haven’t learned a thing.”

Mary was smiling, but it was a very tired smile. It was the way an adult who has lived a long time smiles. Mary probably is long-lived, but that expression didn’t suit her face.

“Something happened with your brother, didn’t it?”

I stood in front of where Mary was sitting. I felt like this was something I had to face head-on right now.

“Yeah. To be honest, that’s the reason I became completely unable to sleep without nightmares.”

“Your brother… did he… pass away?”

Since she was so fixated on him, I figured that might be the case.

“No, my brother is called the ‘Pigeon of the Underworld Blacker than Darkness,’ and apparently he’s doing just fine in the Demon Realm.”

Wait, then what’s with this obsession?

“I actually told my brother once that I was in love with him…”

A massive bombshell had just been dropped immediately after waking up.

“That’s… what you’d call a forbidden love, right?”

Mary gave a firm nod. Meanwhile, Cerulia was practically vibrating, whispering, “Kyaaa! How passionate!” Apparently, for a Succubus, this was a high-tension topic.

“I was quite serious. I thought that if there was love, we could overcome anything. But my brother left me. He said it was a bad influence on my upbringing, so he wouldn’t come near me anymore… He said he wouldn’t see me until he knew I was in love with a proper man…”

So even demons have concepts like “upbringing.” Well, Cerulia gives off the air of a refined young lady, so I guess it’s not that strange.

“Because I said something unnecessary, I ended up further away from him… After that, whenever I think of him, I wake up from a nightmare immediately… and because I started spreading those nightmares around, I became known as the ‘Indescribable Ancestor of Nightmares’…”

Perhaps because I reminded her of the past, Mary was being unusually sentimental. She looked exactly like a young girl who had her heart broken by her first love.

I don’t exactly have experience comforting people in a situation like this, but I had to say something.

“Um, this might sound strange coming from me, but—I don’t think you need to regret it.”

“What do you mean? Of course I regret it!”

Mary turned toward me with a huff.

“Then, if you had never told him how you felt, do you think you’d be happy? Do you truly believe you’d be happier keeping those feelings hidden forever?”

I asked her this while looking her straight in the eye. Mary’s face took on a startled expression.

“There’s no way… Because then, there would be no possibility at all of me being with him…”

And there was the answer.

“Exactly. Regardless of whether it would come true or not, you had to tell him! It was inevitable, so there’s no point in regretting it, is there?”

There is no right or wrong in love. Of course, I know some loves are destined to go unrequited. But even so, once you fall in love, you just have to accept that’s how it is. You can’t force yourself not to love someone, anyway.

Mary never had a choice from the start. In that case, there’s no point in agonizing over what’s already done.

“That’s why you should think about what comes next.”

This time, I was the one who moved to hug her. Given our positions, I just gently wrapped my arms around her while she was sitting. I felt it was the most I could do for her right now.

“I’m not your big brother, and from your perspective, I might have only lived for a tiny fraction of time, but I can at least hug you in his place.”

“Big Brother! Big Brother! Please, don’t go away!”

Mary hit my chest softly with her fists, overcome with emotion. Very softly. Because if she hadn’t, I’d probably be dead. That’s how terrifying of a demon she is.

“Stay with me… please…”

“If you’re okay with me.”

“Stroke my head…” she said, looking up at me.

I felt embarrassed, but it would be cruel to refuse for that reason. Stroke, stroke.
After a while, Mary let out a long breath and pulled away from me.

“Franz, thank you. I feel a bit better now.”

“If you’re thanking me for something like this, it’s an easy task. It’s not like I cast some incredible spell.”

“No, I feel like you did cast an incredible spell on me. You’re a great Dark Mage.”

Mary gave a bashful smile.

“I really would like to sleep while being hugged by you once in a while. It’s true that I can sleep soundly and feel at peace.”

“But, well… ‘slow torture’ really is a bit of an ordeal for me, you know…”

Looking shy, Mary averted her eyes slightly.

“Then… I’ll overlook it even if you turn into a wolf… If you absolutely must… it’s okay… I’ve probably lived long enough that even a hundred of your lifetimes wouldn’t be enough to match mine…”

WHAAAAAT?!