Chapter 59

Was she planning to re-educate me into a fanatic, just like the other Temple attendants she dragged around? Just the thought made my skin crawl. To make matters worse, the Guild Leader—the very man who was supposed to be protecting me—joined in, incessantly pushing me toward that psycho without a hint of situational awareness.

“Yeah, yeah. I don’t know what you did wrong, but go and repent. Visit the Temple diligently and get your body and soul purified and all that.”

“Don’t make me laugh! I’m not going! I’m not doing it!”

I didn’t even want to deal with them anymore. To escape from these lunatics, I kicked my chair and stood up. Just as I was considering whether to go through with resigning from the Martial Regiment in my fit of rage, the Saint looked between the Guild Leader and the attendant and said she wanted to speak with me alone. She said she would persuade me herself, so she asked them to step aside.

The attendant looked a bit worried, but eventually, they cleared out along with the Guild Leader.

I stood there, looking down at the Saint. I built a thick wall of defense in my heart, determined not to be swayed no matter what she said. However, to the Saint, who had already grasped my weaknesses, someone like me was a being she could crush like a bug.

“Back then, the reason the Temple ordered the assassination of the Count of Lallanne.”

“…….”

“It was because there was insufficient evidence to execute him officially.”

The topic was unexpected, and since it was also related to Iel, I couldn’t help but listen closely. The Saint’s calm voice seemed to drift toward my feet.

“The evidence that he was an apostle of an otherworldly god.”

“…….”

“Even so, we couldn’t just watch and wait until we had enough evidence; we didn’t have time. We were on the verge of a giant existence tearing through the world and crossing over.”

According to the Saint, high-ranking priests including herself occasionally inherit a portion of the Main God’s authority. When that happens, they become able to sensually perceive intangible flows like mystical energy.

The Saint’s prophesying and receiving oracles are also part of that flow. Moreover, it is said that the reason she sensed the anomalies in the Lallanne territory in advance was also due to the influence of that authority.

Therefore, she said that even before the assassination of the Count of Lallanne, they had already been feeling that something tremendous was happening in the world.

However, that didn’t mean they could sense that the Count of Lallanne was an apostle. If it were that easy to identify, the otherworldly god would have no reason to create apostles in the first place.

Therefore, she said that regarding the Count of Lallanne’s true identity, it was merely human speculation based on weak circumstantial evidence.

Ultimately, this meant the Temple had placed the order while accepting the possibility that their judgment might be wrong.

“Fortunately, my judgment wasn’t wrong, as the giant existence stopped moving after the Count of Lallanne perished. I told you, didn’t I? Creating an apostle requires great effort, so when one is lost, the main body suffers a significant blow.”

Thus, she says the fact that the giant existence had remained halted for several years is proof enough that the Count of Lallanne was indeed an apostle.

However, the anomalous phenomena occurring all over the country, including the barrier that enclosed the Lallanne territory, left the Temple with the anxiety that perhaps the problem hadn’t been resolved properly.

And then, the return of the Countess of Lallanne.

I skipped over that part since we had already talked about it last time. To summarize it, it was because the Saint had used me to verify that Iel was an apostle.¹

Before long, the Saint said.

“But it’s unlikely that they would have created multiple apostles at once. Creating even one is straining; two would be quite difficult. Yet, it’s also hard to say she’s an apostle of a god with a completely different concept, considering it’s the Countess of Lallanne. Her connection to the dead Count of Lallanne is too close.”

“…….”

“So, the Temple had to think. Is the Count of Lallanne truly dead? Indeed, was he a being that a human could kill?”

“What?”

“Only then did we begin to focus on the fact that an apostle is a demigod.”

The memory surfaced in my mind at that instant.

“Why did the Countess of Lallanne only appear after several years had passed? What did she actually do during that time, when she claimed she couldn’t remember?”

Iel, giggling as she rose from her chair.

‘I wondered who it was.’

“The Temple’s prediction is this: The Count of Lallanne took over the body of the Countess of Lallanne.”

‘You wretch, you turned my several years of hardship into nothing!’

“That can’t be.”

Even though my heart was pounding extremely fast, the voice that flowed out of my mouth was calm enough to surprise even me.

The Saint didn’t press her opinion strongly and nodded.

“Indeed. It may not be. We are merely human, and we are capable of making mistakes in our judgment. Therefore, I will ask you, the person closest to her throughout the past and present.”

“…….”

“Do you not feel any particular sense of dissonance from her?”

I answered without even a second of hesitation.

“There’s no such thing.”

It wasn’t that there was truly no room for hesitation; it was that I felt I shouldn’t hesitate here and now.

Hearing my answer, the Saint said that was a relief, then. That she was reassured.

“True, there are definitely aspects that don’t align if one were to equate her with the Count of Lallanne. The fact that her current life is very humble and peaceful is one such point. In that case, I will trust you and explain it well to the Temple.”

In truth, I wasn’t guarding against her very much even now, but she said this would provide further peace of mind.

“Even if she is an apostle, it doesn’t seem like she is engaging in any particular heretical activity. Rather, her recent actions are closer to cooperation. That is why the Temple has no intention of ostracizing her.”

“…….”

“So, you shouldn’t worry either, and please accept the Temple’s service. For your own sake.”

This time, I couldn’t express my refusal. Saying she believed I understood, the Saint stood up from her seat.

Since that day, even if the Saint’s suspicions had been dispelled, my own heart had become complicated.

I began to investigate the past deeds of the dead Count of Lallanne. It wasn’t that I suspected Iel was the Count. It wasn’t that, but I became eager to confirm what exactly was mixed in with Iel.

What if I discover his characteristics in Iel? One side of my heart says she’s Iel anyway, so what does it matter? But on the other hand, there was a sense of discomfort. Perhaps it was because there was a clear image of the ‘Count of Lallanne.’

It was more unpleasant than dismissing it as something unknown.

This is what happened to me while Iel was immersed in the prayer book at her parents’ home.

Some things are still ongoing to this day. My complicated state of mind refuses to unravel, and the Temple requests under the name of ‘service’ are just irritating.

The rest I needed so much was never taken, and my body and mind have only become more exhausted.

In the end, I unintentionally revealed my uncomfortable feelings toward Iel today. It was because I was still unable to see Iel as a single whole. I hate myself like this, too.

Even though I love her.

Every time I suddenly feel a sense of dissonance, I hesitate without realizing it. Just as I try to look away because I don’t want to think about it, I end up feeling it through my senses. I couldn’t do anything about my body’s reactions, so I was just frustrated.

“Huff….”

“The primary analysis ends here. Young Master, please proceed with the transcription from here.”

“Transcription?”

“It means I want you to read it thoroughly yourself while you transcribe it.”

“Can’t I just read it thoroughly?”

“Then please transcribe it while you’re at it.”

When I asked him to contact me after he finished the transcription, Leonis stared straight at me with his mouth shut tight. I had started to notice that his expression signified dissatisfaction or grievance, but I pretended not to know.

Leonis needed to read it properly at least once anyway. Wouldn’t it be good to transcribe it while reading it? It’s more rational than setting aside separate time.

“Of course you know this, but you must not let anyone else transcribe it.”

I had to avoid the risk of the book’s contents leaking.

“I know.”

“Right? I just said it out of excess worry.”

I smiled brightly and packed my bag. Leonis stood still, holding the book, and said.

“You didn’t change your clothes today.”

“I’ll be returning straight home once I finish studying from now on. It was cumbersome trying to change on purpose, so I decided to stay as I am. Does it bother you, by any chance?”

If it bothers you, I’ll change from next time. You’re my superior, anyway. I lifted the corners of my lips while looking at him with that thought. Leonis replied that it didn’t matter.

“Thank you for understanding.”

Leonis soon took a wooden box out of his desk drawer and handed it to me.

“What is this?”

“I borrowed it from an acquaintance of the Estelle family. Please return it later.”

When I opened the wooden box, there were several scrolls inside. I closed the lid and expressed my gratitude to Leonis.

“I’ll enjoy reading them. Thank you.”

“We made a promise, after all. But are you leaving right now?”

“Yes. I have more to do than I look.”

“I didn’t mean to treat you as if you had nothing to do. I only thought that Mother would be disappointed if you returned.”

Anne was not at the mansion as she had gone out to a gathering today. I asked him to explain the situation to her well for me.