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“Look. The filthy slime you created has soiled my hair.”
Drako pointed at her long, outward-flipping golden hair while still smiling. Her eye was not smiling.
“Supupu, isn’t it a nice hairstyle? The black, squishy accents suit the gold very well.”
At the Dragon of Human Knowledge’s voice, Drako’s eye narrowed even further.
Whoosh.
Golden flames lit on their own, burning away the slime clinging to Drako’s body and hair.
“…But there is something I dislike even more. You, whose friend do you think you are touching so familiarly? Move away from Naruhito.”
“I must refuse… Being beside him is my wish, after all.”
The beauties—no, the beautiful dragons—smiled brightly at each other while veins bulged on their foreheads.
The Tibetan sand fox-like man caught between them could only freeze.
“Huh? What is that supposed to mean? And what is with that first-person pronoun of yours? Fifty years ago, you used a different one, did you not? You spoke in a much stiffer way.”
“Supupu, ahh, you do not even know that, do you? Tooyama-kun likes girls who call themselves ‘boku.’ It is what one calls a fetish. Any female creature adjusts herself to the tastes of the male she likes, no?”
“Huh?! How do you know that?!”
The fire unexpectedly spread to him, and Tooyama’s eyes widened after his hidden fetish was casually exposed.
“…Is that true, Naruhito?”
Drako looked at him somewhat sadly. Drako’s first-person pronoun was “ore,” not “boku.”
“…What are you talking about?”
Tooyama instinctively looked away from Drako. It was not that intimidating gaze, but somehow it was the hardest gaze he had ever endured.
“Supupu, ‘boku.’”
The Dragon of Human Knowledge, her lips twisted like a Cheshire cat, whispered beside Tooyama’s ear.
“…!”
His body’s core jumped.
It was true. Tooyama Naruhito was weak to girls who called themselves “boku.”
But, but in this world, was there truly any man who was not weak to girls who called themselves “boku,” to mysterious black-haired beauties with good faces who called themselves “boku”?
If there is, come out here. Heave-ho, yo-heave. Tooyama was thrown into a mild panic—
“Your body temperature rose by 0.1 degrees. Your heartbeat also went from 59 to 68… Supupu.”
The Dragon of Human Knowledge whispered happily. Since her face was good, Tooyama tried to look away from her as much as possible.
Ah, this carpet is refined and nice… The color is calm, and it is fluffy.
“Naruhito… You…”
Lazaar’s voice sounded deeply exasperated. From his lizard face, nose tightly wrinkled, the message “Are you sane?” was clearly conveyed.
“Sorry, Lazaar… I like them… Girls who call themselves ‘boku’…”
Tooyama placed a hand on the carpet and muttered bitterly. People could not betray their fetishes.
The Dragon of Human Knowledge snorted proudly, while the Hoarding Dragon opened her eye wide and froze.
The contest of superiority between superior beings continued.
“Ah, it is over.”
The bishop’s stomach ended at the Hoarding Dragon’s snapped expression. Literally.
“Bishop-sama is becoming fragile again?!”
“My Lady, water!”
While the bishop and the others were becoming amusing, the glaring contest between the Dragon of Human Knowledge and the Hoarding Dragon, dragons deeply connected to the human world, continued.
“?! I dislike this. I dislike it greatly, Omniscient Dragon!! What wicked and tyrannical cunning! I will burn and tear apart that tongue of yours for bewitching my friend!”
“Friend! Supupu! Tooyama-kun, you really are quite the dragon charmer… For this unruly horse to see a human as an equal… Well, that is exactly what makes you worthy of being my ideal specimen… As I thought, you and I are connected by something fated.”
“…Fated?”
The Hoarding Dragon reacted to the Dragon of Human Knowledge’s words.
“Supupu, yes, exactly. Hoarding Dragon, in a story you do not know—”
“Fukaka.”
“…What is it?”
Alice’s laugh interrupted Ai’s words. The Dragon of Human Knowledge looked suspiciously at the dragon before her.
“…No, nothing. I only found it amusing that even the so-called Omniscient Dragon would start speaking of fate. …The fate between a dragon and a human. I see, I see. If that is what we are speaking of, then I and Naruhito are precisely fated—no, destined beings.”
Her blue eye twisted with amusement. That eye, colored by both the cruelty of a dragon and the cruelty of a girl, grinned.
“What are you…?”
The Dragon of Human Knowledge faltered slightly at that gaze.
“Dragon Slayer.”
The Hoarding Dragon’s cherry-blossom-colored lips spun that word.
“…Tch.”
“Naruhito is the dragon slayer who killed me once. No, he is my dragon slayer. Oh? Oh my, oh my, oh my? For a dragon, being challenged and defeated by a strong one is the highest honor, an act that brings causality to both souls… Kaka, despite everything you say, it seems you have never been killed by Naruhito. Oh my? Fate? How mysterious. Even though you do not have a relationship of killing and being killed?”
“…What are you trying to say?”
“Old virgin.”
“…Brat.”
“Fukaka, whether I am a brat or anything else, do not forget this: Naruhito’s first partner in dragon slaying was not the Omniscient Dragon. It was me, the Hoarding Dragon.”
“…Those eyes remind me of that flame idiot. They make me want to crush them.”
“Fukaka, they are good eyes, yes? …I respect your tearful effort in adjusting yourself to Naruhito’s preferences. But, fukaka, no matter how hard you try, my relationship with Naruhito is that of dragon and dragon slayer. Do you not realize there is no room for you to enter?”
“…Young dragon. While I was not looking, it seems only your mouth grew skilled.”
“Old dragon. Watching you lust after a young human male is unbearable. Do you plan to ask Naruhito for nursing care?”
“…Supupu, the Flame Dragon who protects you is not here. Shall I teach a young dragon who does not know how to speak some proper judgment?”
“Fukaka, for you to bring up Grandfather’s name here means you must truly resent being burned by those flames. Old people really should not drag the past around.”
Neither gold nor black yielded one step.
Those caught up in it could not bear it.
“…Wow.”
Lazaar drained his sixth cup of honey water.
“Ufufu, the Omniscient Dragon and the Hoarding Dragon are glaring each other down inside my Church… Ufufu, it is over. The Angel Church is over. Kanosa Tier Field will go down in Imperial history as the bishop who ended the Angel Church. The sky is so pretty.”
“Bishop-sama?! You cannot see the sky from here!”
“My Lady?! Which sky are you looking at?! That is not a sky you should be seeing!”
The bishop gazed up at the sky, and the saint and covert operative began making noise as they tried to call her back.
“Naruhito, Naruhito, Naruhito…! Our new boss is about to faint…! At this rate we will be unemployed immediately! Please, do something!”
“You say do something, but…”
While Tooyama and Lazaar exchanged whispers and gestures, the dragons’ glaring contest continued.
“Those eyes… I have disliked them since long ago. Those blue eyes, the same as the first dragon, and they are similar to that bastard Flame Dragon’s too.”
“Sorry for being well-born and well-raised. After all, my mother is the Flower Dragon born from flame and water, and my father is the Iron Dragon born from flame and stone. My bloodline is guaranteed. Oops, you are… Hmm, were you born from mud or something? No wonder your eyes are so gloomy.”
“Hah?”
“Hmph.”
Dragon, Greed, Dragon.
The Tibetan sand fox man, whose stamina was about to reach its limit, was caught between two beautiful dragons.
The lizard kept escaping into honey water, and the money-grubbing woman continued looking up at a sky she should not be seeing.
“…Ah.”
Suddenly, the Tibetan sand fox realized something. The two terrifying beautiful dragons were still only glaring at each other and had not yet laid hands on one another.
“These two…”
Whether Drako or the Dragon of Human Knowledge, their ferocity and willingness to act were guaranteed. One was an inhuman brute who enjoyed making slaves kill each other, and the other was a pervert who drank human blood and turned humans into amusing objects.
Despite that, they still had not directly attacked each other. In other words—
His accelerated thoughts brought about that mutter.
“…Which one of you is stronger?”
A bomb.
It was too late after he said it. Tooyama was the type to wonder about such things. If Godzilla and Gamera fought, which would be stronger? What about King Ghidorah and Iris?
“I am.”
“I am.”
““Huh?””
Godzilla and Gamera, or perhaps King Ghidorah and Iris. The viscosity of the two’s killing intent grew thicker.
“………………”
With that exchange, he was certain.
These two understood each other’s power. They were not opponents who could dispose of each other as a game. It was like how a country with nuclear weapons would not easily attack another country with nuclear weapons.
“Naruhito… What have you done?”
Lazaar’s eyes were completely swimming. Likewise, the bishop and the others kept looking up at the sky and did not move.
“Huh?”
Tooyama, who had been submerged in a sea of thought, returned to his senses at Lazaar’s words. The room’s atmosphere had grown even more viscous.
“To begin with, what are you? Of course your first-person pronoun is strange, but a few months ago you suddenly changed your name too. Everything you do irritates me.”
“Supupu, this is why selfish young dragons are troublesome. How I handle my name is up to me, yes, this me, the Dragon of Human Knowledge.”
“Mgh.”
The Dragon of Human Knowledge smoothly pulled Tooyama’s head against her chest. Though modest, there was a definite softness he could feel through the smooth robe at the back of his head.
“The Dragon of Human Knowledge is with Tooyama Naruhito. That too is my freedom. Ahh, relax, Tooyama-kun. I am stronger than the Hoarding Dragon. The one suited to stand beside you is the stronger and wiser dragon, is it not?”
Her black hair touched Tooyama’s neck and tickled him. Her whisper was close enough that he could even feel the Dragon of Human Knowledge’s breath.
“…I will not say it twice. Do not touch Naruhito.”
This was bad.
The moment he heard that voice, chills and numbness ran through his vaguely dazed body.
Drako had completely snapped. She wore the same presence as during their worst first meeting in that Tower, the atmosphere of a cruel dragon.
Ping.
The notice of a quest arrived at the worst possible timing.
Thump. A compulsory impulse. His body reacted, telling him to obey it.
Information output from the deepest depths of the world, the bottom of the bottom, or perhaps from the ceiling above the heavens, became letters and flowed into Tooyama’s vision.
An arrow suddenly appeared. The quest marker.
It brought an impulse to follow the mission, but it was blocked by Tooyama Naruhito’s happy head, boiled by dungeon intoxication and broken by a yandere’s hypnosis.
“My head hurts… Damn it, what kind of landmine choice is that?”
Tooyama Naruhito did not obey missions. The only thing he obeyed was the desire rising from himself.
As expected, the arrow was no good. It was an arrow trying to guide him toward Drako. Tooyama grabbed it and twisted it like wringing a rag until it tore apart.
He was beginning to get a little used to shredding that arrow that clearly guided the situation in a bad direction.
“Muoh?”
“Eh, eeh…?”
The two dragons who had been bristling with killing intent voiced confusion.
From the perspective of the two dragons, it could only look as though Tooyama had suddenly reached into empty space and made a gesture as if twisting something.
Tooyama’s sudden bizarre action drained a slight amount of their hostility.
Ping.
In place of the arrow he had torn to pieces, new arrows pointed toward the Dragon of Human Knowledge and the Hoarding Dragon.
“You again, giving me something that looks insanely hard.”
He complained under his breath at the unreasonable instruction.
“Huh?”
“Huh?”
“Hey, you fool. Because you came closer with that stinking body of yours, Naruhito is frightened, is he not? How many times must I say it? Move away.”
“Frightened? Impossible. There is no way Tooyama-kun would be frightened of me. If you are frustrated, then you should touch him like this too. Ah! Sorry, sorry, an innocent young dragon could never do something like that, could she?”
“Hah, you shameless harlot who approaches humans without restraint. It seems not even the little girl who discovered the childish play called magical formulas was enough for you. Enough. I cannot allow my friend to pick up your rotten stench. …Move. I will not say it again.”
“I. Refuse. I finally gathered what I needed and arrived here. I will never leave him again. Ancient Nihon says those who interfere in another’s romance are kicked to death, but I wonder what happens to dragons.”
How is this easy, you bastard? This is like stopping a fight between the King of Monsters and Monster Zero.
Tooyama was dumbfounded between the two beautiful dragons.
Ping, ping, ping.
The message flowed persistently.
The dragons’ names. Very easy. Dragon names. Very easy.
No way—
An idea descended into Tooyama’s intellect-filled brain. It was absurd, and it assumed something far too convenient.
But he had no choice but to bet on it.
It was a speech situation where he should use his head and tongue. However, the choice Tooyama selected was extremely simple.
“…Hey, Alice, Ai.”
He called the dragons by their names.
“Gyau?!”
“Supih?!”
And that was the correct answer. In an instant, the beautiful dragons’ killing intent calmed.
For a moment, the two dragons revealed their tails and froze.
As if cold water had been poured over them, the two dragons stopped moving.
This was it.
Tooyama’s cunning brain and tongue began to turn. Speech Challenge. The art of deception that misled the world entangled the dragons.
“…I do not know what kind of relationship you two have, and I will not tell you not to fight. But please, do not do it here. If you are going to do it, do it somewhere else.”
“N-Naruhito? Wh-what is wrong?”
“T-Tooyama-kun? A-are you angry?”
“I am not angry, Alice. As your friend, I am asking you. Do not do it here.”
“Gya?! Again, my name… I-I understand, I understand.”
Alice let out a short scream as her eye darted around. The gaze that usually saw straight through Tooyama now scattered in all directions, busily swimming.
“…Ai. I do not know who you are. But you healed my arm and, in the end, helped me. Thank you. But please do not rampage here.”
“Supih! Y-yes, I-I understand…”
The dragon clad in a black robe straightened her back with a snap and then stopped moving.
““……………………””
Flap, flap.
A thick tail covered in golden scales and a thin tail covered in black slime. Only those swayed left and right.
Ping.
It was almost anticlimactic how the dragons, who had been distorting the space with eyes warped by killing intent and anger, had turned into nothing more than fidgeting dragons.
“…Let us change locations, Hoarding Dragon, Alice Dral Flaretail.”
After a long silence, the Dragon of Human Knowledge put away her tail, returned her tone to normal, and quietly spoke to the Hoarding Dragon.
“Gladly, Omniscient Dragon, Ai Kelbrem Doctustail.”
The collector instantly restored her wandering gaze and answered with her deep blue eye.
“I am the Dragon of Human Knowledge, though.”
“Hmph, either is fine. …Naruhito called my name first.”
Suddenly, Drako grinned triumphantly.
“Hah? His voice was warmer when he called my name, though.”
The Dragon of Human Knowledge immediately tilted her head, refusing to lose.
““Huh?””
From fidgeting dragons to superiority dragons.
Again they glared at each other from close range and raised their hands at each other, casually distorting space.
Then both of them passed through that distortion and quietly vanished from the room.
Ping.
A new skill has been added to hidden skills.
“…Case closed?”
At the very least, he had prevented a dragon battle from breaking out inside this room.
Surely he had done his job. Tooyama turned toward his colleagues.
“Bishop… sama, that man… charmer…”
“Naruhito… has that side…”
“Women… enemies… seducing… dragons… charming…”
“Svi, Tossle… men like that… trust… no…”
Whisper, whisper, whispeeer.
Their whispered conversation only let the important parts be heard.
“Oops, I just witnessed the moment reputational damage occurred.”
Tooyama muttered despite himself as he looked at his reliable, useless companions.
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